


sparks will fall on me (starry eyes)

by kyomohokus



Category: SixTONES (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Everyone is chaotic, Light Angst, M/M, Romance, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:33:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 30,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25507513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyomohokus/pseuds/kyomohokus
Summary: The moment the new kid walked in the theater club room, Taiga knows he's fucked.(Or, Taiga would be damned if he lets Matsumura Hokuto be the one that got away. Again.)
Relationships: Kyomoto Taiga/Matsumura Hokuto, Tanaka Juri/OC, implied Matsushima Sou/Marius Yo, slight Nakajima Yuto/Yamada Ryosuke
Comments: 67
Kudos: 77





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, I am been consumed by this pairing called Kyomohoku, and this fic is proof.
> 
> I haven't gotten to fully know SixTONES yet. I've been casually looking at content, but I didn't let these boys into my life until their debut. So please bear with me if the characterizations are off.

“Hey, Kochi, I think those freshmen have a thing for each other.”

Kochi Yugo barely looks up from his textbook ( _ Don Quixote _ by Miguel Cervantes, Taiga observes). Beside him in the university theater club room, their senior, Mitsumune Kaoru, is staring intently at whatever’s on her laptop screen. “Well, hello, Taiga,” Kochi greets dryly. “How are you this fine afternoon? Didn’t you say you have to study for a calculus exam?”

Taiga shrugs. He sets down his bag on the mahogany table and plops on the seat across Kochi’s. “Exam is in two weeks. I can afford to take a break now and then.”

Kochi raises a cynical eyebrow. “And how long have you been procrastinating?”

“Shut up.”

Kochi laughs, serious façade disappearing completely. “Which freshmen are we talking about? I thought of Jesse and Shin, but then I remember Jesse mentioning he’s into a female classmate.”

Taiga grins, leaning forward from his seat as if he’s about to tell today’s lottery numbers. “Matsushima and Yo.” He surveys the club room’s open door to see Marius Yo and Matsushima Sou pass by, talking amicably to each other. “Just look at the way they stare at each other! They look like the sun shines from each other’s asses.”

“Isn’t it wrong to be speculating about other people’s love lives?”

Taiga thinks for a moment before shrugging. “It’s not like it’s the first time we’ve bet on the love lives of people in this club.”

“Good point.” Kochi hums in agreement. He grins and takes out a yellow notebook, ripping a sheet of paper from the back then picking up his pen. “Okay, let’s bet on it. How long will it take for Marius Yo and Matsushima Sou to ask each other out?”

“Two months,” Taiga answers immediately.

Kaoru takes out her earphones. “It’ll be three,” she chimes in. “Marius-kun is too shy, and Sou-kun is too oblivious.”

Taiga retreats, the legs of his chair scraping against the mahogany floor. “What the fuck, Kaoru-senpai? You were listening in on us the whole time?”

Kochi doesn’t seem affected. He nods as he notes down Kaoru’s prediction below Taiga’s, his lips pursed. “I’ll give it two months.”

“I say two months, too,” the voice of Takaki Yuya, theater club president, rings out as he steps inside the room. He casually lays a hand on the space on the table next to Kochi. “Who’s winning the bet so far about Yamada and Nakajima?”

“Let me check.” Kochi stands up and opens one of the room’s filing cabinets, pulling out a manila folder. He opens the folder and pulls out a sheet of paper. “Let’s see. Oba-senpai thinks they will finally go out by June, but Paruru says September. Taiga and Hasshi both think October.”

Taiga peeks from behind Kochi’s shoulder. “And what does Inoo-senpai mean by ‘Laughs maniacally and walks away’?”

Takaki doesn’t conceal his laughter. “He thinks they’ll end up being emotionally constipated and they’ll rot away forever alone. With the way things are going, he might end up winning.”

“Shouldn’t you be discouraging this behavior as president?” Kaoru asks, grinning.

Takaki shrugs. “Last year’s seniors placed lots of bets. Wouldn’t want to stop good ol’ club tradition.”

Taiga, meanwhile, rummages through the old bets, ranging from trivial (Can Kawai Fumito successfully fool freshmen into thinking he’s Dean Matsumoto Jun?) to semi-serious (How long will it take Goseki Kochi to convince theater club president Miyazawa Sae to change the club room’s wallpaper?).

Takaki sighs, and suddenly he’s back to his President mode. “Anyway, I got sidetracked. I’ll just wait for Takamina to arrive, and we’ll start planning for our next show.”

“Yes, senpai,” the three of them say at the same time.

  
  


As soon as he stepped into university, Taiga immediately signed up for the theater club. He was a member of his high school’s theater club, so he’s well versed in singing, dancing, and acting.

The theater club doesn’t accept a fixed actor pool, so he ends up being in the Finance team since his major is Business Finance. Still, he was encouraged to audition for shows—since lots of members of the club do that anyway—and he ended up in a couple, mostly as part of an ensemble. He wants to land a main role soon, but he’s aware that it would take more hard work.

The core team that makes up the theater club is small but close-knit. There’s Takaki Yuya and Takahashi Minami, the president and vice-president, respectively. They’re often dubbed as the club’s ‘parents,’ even though Takahashi-senpai has a girlfriend. He’s the closest to Kochi Yugo, a sophomore from the Humanities Department, and he sometimes hangs out with Mitsumune Kaoru, his assistant manager in the Finance team. He’s already endeared with freshmen Jesse Lewis and Morimoto Shintaro, who are in marketing and partnerships and logistics, respectively.

Their club is dysfunctional, to say the least. Sometimes they spend more time goofing around, but when there’s a show, they’re completely serious and capable of their tasks. They like placing bets on the most random things, but they know when to draw the line with the teasing.

Despite the chaos, the club  _ works _ . The university president once mentioned that the theater club is one of the most organized clubs, and Taiga takes pride in belonging to this family.

  
  


For Taiga, though, “family” also means his parents who are always away in some part of the world.

And then there’s his best friend, Juri, who he only talks to on video calls.

“I can’t believe you’re betting on your freshmen now,” Juri says through the phone. He sounds like he’s scolding Taiga, but it doesn’t sound harsh. “Let children be.”

Taiga rolls his eyes even though Juri can’t see him. “They’re on the road to adulthood, Juri.” He shifts on his bed so that he’s looking at his bedroom ceiling. “And besides, you should see the way Matsushima stares at Yo. That’s the thickest one-sided pining I’ve ever seen in my life.”

“Oh really?”

He senses the smirk in Juri’s voice. “What’s that supposed to mean?” he demands, even though the dread pooling in his stomach tells him he already knows the answer.

“Is it thicker than the one-sided pining you had for Matsumura Hokuto?”

Damn.

“Shut up,” Taiga groans. “It’s been a year. As Elsa said, ‘Let it go.’”

“Nope,” Juri singsongs delightedly.

Taiga hears a female voice in the background. “Is that your girlfriend?”

“Yeah, sorry,” Juri says. “She made dinner, so I should probably go. Talk to you later?”

Taiga tries his best not to sound disappointed. “Okay,” he says.

There seems to be a brief hesitation from the other line before he hears a long exhale. “I’m sorry, Taiga,” Juri says, and he sounds genuinely regretful. “I miss you a lot, but—”

“It’s Keio, I know,” Taiga says quickly. “I would have wanted to be in the same uni, but a scholarship to fucking Keio is big. It just kind of sucks you’re not next door anymore. I miss you a lot.”

“Hey, I’ll try to visit in a couple of weeks,” Juri points out. “And at least you still have the theater club. It sounds like you’re having fun yourself.”

He  _ is  _ having fun. He loves hanging out with people in the theater club. Still, it will never compare to sleepovers with Juri, or hanging out on the school rooftop, or escaping university review classes to go to the arcade or get comfort ramen.

“I really have to go, but I’ll call you the same time tomorrow, okay?”

“Okay.”

Juri hangs up, and Taiga sighs and tosses his phone to the end table. It’s been more than a year since Juri moved to Tokyo and Taiga to Saitama, but it feels like an eternity for Taiga. Maybe he’s melodramatic, but it’s not easy being suddenly separated from your best friend of eleven years.

It’s not like he’s dependent on Juri, but he feels like he’s lost half his being when the center of his support system has been ripped away. They’re an hour and a half away, but a long train ride feels like a mountain compared to a quick knock on the neighboring house’s door.

Taiga and Juri have been neighbors since they were nine and have been inseparable ever since. They both enjoyed math and dreamed of going to the same university together.

They did, but Juri got a scholarship to Keio University, and Taiga would be stupid not to encourage his best friend to take it.

And Taiga’s really happy for Juri. His best friend seems to have joined a circle of friends and is part of the dance club. He met a really nice girl who he’s happily dating.

Meanwhile, Taiga’s lack of love life is pitiful in comparison. He blames Matsumura Hokuto.

But that’s not something he’d like to dwell on tonight.

Taiga’s phone vibrates, and he already knows it’s his group chat with the theater club. He reaches for his phone and reads the messages.

  
  


**President Takaki [8:15 pm]**

Hello team! Just letting you know a transferee student will be joining our club as part of the Logistics team. He’ll be dropping by at 4 pm at the club room, so whoever’s there, give him a warm welcome!

**Oba - Logistics Head [8:16 pm]**

Alright! ☆*:.｡.o(≧▽≦)o.｡.:*☆

**Taiga - Finance Team [8:17 pm]**

Roger that! (･ω･)b

  
  


Taiga sets down his phone again. A new member of the team, huh? He remembers stepping into the theater club’s room for a quick interview with the previous president and feeling like he instantly belongs.

He hasn’t met the new guy yet, but Taiga hopes he’ll feel exactly the same he did.

  
  


The theater club is crowded when Taiga arrives the next day. Luckily, Kochi manages to save him a seat, and he tolerates the squished space as they chat about their general education subjects.

“Impromptu bet?” Taiga proposes. “Will the new kid be hot or not? I’m putting down 500 yen.”

Kochi shakes his head, slapping down bills down on the desk. “I’ll say he’ll look average.”

Kaoru purses her lips before slowly placing money on the desk, too. “I’m gonna side with Kochi on this one.”

Taiga tosses his money on the pile. “Easiest money I’ve ever made,” he declares with a grin.

The entire room falls into a hush when Takaki enters the room, leaving the door slightly open. “So, as you’ve all heard, a new member of the team will be joining us today. He’s a sophomore student who transferred from Seikei. He’ll be under Mina-san’s team in Logistics, and he’s had experience with sound and equipment in his high school theater club. Plays the piano, too.”

“Looks like we’re finding out right now,” Kaoru whispers as Takaki swings the door open.

A young man steps out, wearing a sweater and jeans. He has wavy black hair, swept slightly to the side to reveal a wide forehead.

Kochi and Kaoru both groan. “We lost,” Kochi sighs, pushing the money to Taiga’s direction.

Taiga, however, is frozen in place. He can’t even breathe.  _ This can’t be real. What the actual fuck is happening? _

Takaki clears his throat. “Everyone,” he announces, clamping a hand on the newcomer’s shoulder. “Meet the new member of our team.”

“I’m Matsumura Hokuto. Nice to meet you.”

Right then and there, Taiga knows he’s completely fucked.


	2. Chapter 2

_ “Um, hey.” Matsumura Hokuto looks at him in the eye, gaze hopeful. “Do you want to come with me?” _

_ It could mean nothing, just a simple invitation to escape the town for a day. But Juri’s voice is telling him to head back to bed. Be a coward, decline the offer, and focus on his final exams. Forget the stupid boy hounding his thoughts for three years now. Leave the door closed and accept that he’s missed out on an opportunity. _

_ But who is Taiga to say no? _

  
  


The moment the meeting adjourns, Taiga practically flings himself off his chair and makes a beeline outside the building. He doesn’t know how he managed to pull out his phone and dial Juri’s number with trembling hands, but he does it, though with much difficulty.

“Taiga?” Juri picks up on the fifth ring. “I’m in the middle of a lecture. What’s wrong?”

“Matsumura Hokuto,” is all Taiga blurts out in reply.

“Matsumura Hoku—Taiga,  _ what the hell? _ You’re calling me in the middle of a lecture because you’re thinking about the guy you had a huge crush on in high school? I swear to god, I will actually—”

“He’s the new member of the theater club!” Taiga cuts in.

The line goes silent for a few seconds. “Oh,” Juri says, and Taiga assumes his best friend’s face has gone blank. “Oh,  _ shit _ .”

Taiga lets out a groan that he had been holding in for the past two hours. “Oh shit, indeed.” He hears footsteps. It could be other students, or it could be theater club members. Worse, it could be Hokuto. “Anyway, I’ll let you get back to your lecture,” he sighs.

“Okay,” Juri sighs. “But Skype me tonight, okay? Looks like we have a lot to talk about.”

Taiga nods feebly. “Right. Talk to you later.”

“Bye, Taiga.”

The first thing he does after hanging up is to bang his head against the wall as hard as he can. Which, he discovers later, is a terrible decision because the wall is made of brick and pain instantly shoots to his head.

Worse, someone laughs ruthlessly while he clutches his head, looking like a complete fool.

“Someone’s not okay,” Kochi says when Taiga turns around to identify the person making fun of him. “What’s up with you?”

Taiga sneaks a glance at the stairs. No one else he knows is approaching, and it looks like it’s just him and Kochi outside the building for club rooms. With a loud groan, Taiga sinks to the stairway steps. “Let’s just say the new member caught me off-guard,” he grumbles under his breath.

Kochi slides on the space next to him. “Matsumura? You guys know each other?”

Sheepishly, Taiga rubs the back of his head. “We went to the same high school together. Same section. Same theater club.”

“Oh.” Kochi nods. “You’re shaken up about Matsumura’s sudden comeback in your life. But you guys barely act like you recognized each other during introductions, and you look shaken up right now. I’m guessing something must have happened between the two of you. Spill the tea, Taiga.”

“The Kochi Yugo I befriended isn’t this sassy,” Taiga comments in an attempt to change the subject.

A foot kicks him in the shin. “Don’t change the subject, coward.”

Kochi isn’t as gossipy as the other club members. He can be trusted. Taiga tucks his chin on his hands, elbows propping on his knees. “There isn’t much to say,” he asserts, energy seeping out of his body. “We were classmates and we were both in the theater club, and I had a crush on him. We weren’t really friends, so nothing happened. I didn’t tell him even after graduation. And that’s it.”

“I see.” Kochi nods, although Taiga could tell that he didn’t buy the story. “So, you dashed after the meeting to make an urgent phone call because your old crush is the new kid of the theater club?”

“What?” Taiga demands.

“Oh, nothing.” Kochi shrugs, though mischief glints in his eyes. “It just seems you still like him.”

Taiga groans, burying his face in his hands. “It’s been a year. I was a stupid high school kid back then. Why would I still have a crush on him?”

Kochi’s grin almost reaches the edges of his face. “I don’t know, Taiga. You tell me.”

It’s official. “That’s it, I’m unfriending you,” he declares.

“Sucks to be you, then.”

  
  


Of course, there’s more to the story about Kyomoto Taiga and Matsumura Hokuto. Things are rarely straightforward.

True: They were in the same section and were in the theater club in high school. Taiga had a crush on Hokuto, but they weren’t really friends.

False: Nothing happened between them.

They didn’t really know each other that well. Taiga always hung out with Juri, while Hokuto either kept to himself or trailed behind Nakajima Kento and Kikuchi Fuma. One time, he ran into Hokuto playing piano in the music room and commented that Hokuto should join the theater club.

To Taiga’s surprise, Hokuto turned in his application the next day. Sometimes he would play the piano, and other times he was by the sound system. Soon, he became an indispensable member of the club.

Call him cheesy, but it was that encounter in the music room that had Taiga’s world freezing into place and realizing that  _ wow Matsumura Hokuto is actually handsome and him playing the piano makes him more attractive. _

Since Hokuto joined the theater club, though, their interactions were few. Taiga treasures the practice sessions he had with Hokuto for his solo performances, because outside club activities, they rarely talked.

To be fair, Taiga should have done something for the past three years. There was always an opportunity to get to know Hokuto, but Taiga, for all his confidence onstage, had been too cautious and nervous about making a move. Any chance was officially dashed when they received their university acceptance letters—Hokuto was going to Tokyo and Taiga to Saitama.

That is, until one spring morning, the weekend before finals.

But that’s a story for another time.

  
  


“And he just appeared out of nowhere?”

“Something like that,” Taiga groans, running a hand through his hair. “Like, what the fuck? I thought he was in Tokyo?”

“Why  _ did  _ he move there?”

“The Humanities Department offered him a full scholarship, and it was much more attractive than Seikei’s.”

From Taiga’s laptop screen, Juri hums pensively as he scrolls through his phone. He looks like he hadn’t gotten enough sleep these past few days, but the bright shine in his eyes is enough to subdue Taiga’s concerns. Juri had accepted that studying in Keio wasn’t easy, but he’s willing to see it through the end.

“Aha!” Juri says victoriously. He brings his phone up to his laptop camera. “From his Instagram post, he just transferred this semester.”

The picture Juri holds up is of Hokuto with people he recognizes as Nakajima and Kikuchi. They were standing outside a familiar white building with flags of different countries hoisted by the exterior. It’s the university’s admin building.

_ Seeing these guys more often now _ , reads Hokuto’s caption. The post is dated April of this year.

“Wow.” Taiga blinks. “Can’t believe he’s been around for the past month already.”

“Yeah,” Juri agrees, pulling his phone away from the camera.

Taiga’s brain hurts way too much to think right now. “But what are the fucking odds? Of all the universities to offer him an incredible scholarship, it had to be this one? Is this what karma looks like?”

Juri snorts. “Please, Taiga. If karma were out to get you, you’d have been fucked a long time ago.”

Taiga flips him off. “Shut the fuck up, Juri.”

“You know I’m right,” Juri shoots back with a mischievous grin. “Anyway, what are you gonna do now? Finally ready to chase after the love of your life?”

“He’s not the love of my life!” Taiga protests. “He’s just some guy I used to have a crush on in high school. Nothing more.”

“Riiiight.” Juri nods skeptically, suddenly sounding like Kochi. “Because you’d be completely freaking out if he were ‘just some guy’ you used to like. Try again, Taiga.”

Taiga resists the urge not to screech, and he ends up flopping down on his back. He’s definitely out of view, but whatever. Juri doesn’t deserve to see his pretty face after exposing him like that.

Juri may read Taiga like the back of his hand, but not even he knows about The Weekend. It’s not that Taiga doesn’t want to tell him, but he doesn’t know how to raise the topic.

It’s not a complicated story to tell, but it’s not straightforward either. There’s no way to explain what happened.

“I guess I still like him,” Taiga finally admits. He heaves himself back up in front of his laptop. “I don’t know if I still like him or caught up on the idea of liking him. I’m so confused right now.”

Juri’s face softens. “Taiga,” he murmurs. “I know I make fun of you about Matsumura a lot, but I know your feelings for him are real. I think it’s good that you’re reflecting and asking yourself this now. But maybe it’s a good sign? Maybe now’s your chance to finally get to know him.”

Taiga shakes his head. “Nah, it’s okay. Even if I get to know him, there’s no telling if something romantic is gonna come out of it. No point holding on to the past.”

Juri purses his lips. “Okay. If you say so.”

  
  


As expected, Hokuto doesn’t interact with the theater club that much. When he’s hanging out in the club room, he spends most of his time on the long table, fingers flipping through a textbook, or quick over his laptop keys. Sometimes he talks with his teammates, but other than that, he hasn’t mingled with the rest of the club.

Honestly, Taiga is glad for it. Hokuto barely even spares him a glance. Their only interaction since the introduction was when Taiga walked into the club room, and Hokuto was walking out, and they did the tango of trying to guess if they were going left or right and ending up going the same way. Hokuto simply apologized and went about on his merry way.

He’s not sure if Hokuto still remembers him. It might be just him, but Taiga could have sworn there was a flash of recognition in Hokuto’s eyes when they shook hands during the introduction, but they didn’t exchange further words or signals after that.

At least until a week later.

“Um … Kyomoto-kun?” Hokuto is standing at the entrance to the club room. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

There’s no one else in the room, and Taiga is sure that no one else in the club has the same surname. “Um … sure,” he says. He gets up from his seat with composure, but he’s internally freaking out. What on earth would Hokuto want to talk to him about?

  
  


_ Taiga is going to regret this. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but sometime soon. Sometime into the future, he’ll look back and wonder why the hell he agreed to this. Why the hell would he accept an offer from a young man he’s always watched from afar but never knew? _

_ Once they leave town and enter smaller, one-lane roads, Hokuto rotates his wrist on the motorcycle’s accelerator, and they speed along the countryside. The wind is whipping Taiga’s hair at his face, and he tries not to lean his head too much against his driver’s back. _

_ “You didn’t have to say yes, you know,” Hokuto suddenly comments, his eyes focused on the road. “I can still turn back if you want.” _

_ Taiga’s inner voice is urging him to go back home, but he ignores it. He shakes his head. “It’s fine. It’s nice to get away sometimes.” _

_ One day, Taiga will ask himself how his one-sided, never-acted-upon crush on Matsumura Hokuto caused him to get into the back of that black motorcycle. It’s one of those stupid, hasty decisions he makes frequently and regrets every time. Maybe he’ll enjoy the moment, but in the end, he’ll be left wondering what had happened. As far as Taiga knows, he’s going to regret this. _

_ But that’s not something he’ll think about today. _


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> motorcycle driver hokuto and now pianist hokuto. i am just projecting my dream boy at this point loljk
> 
> also i'm sad newsies!taiga won't be happening soon, but luckily i can write it in lol

“I was kind of wondering if you know how to access the music room?” Hokuto asks, shuffling his feet. “Oba-senpai said I can check the room and the piano.”

“Oh.” The tension seeps out of Taiga’s shoulders. “Oh, okay. Let me get the keys and I’ll bring you there.”

“Thank you.”

Taiga stands up and grabs his phone on the desk, brushing past Hokuto as he makes his way outside the club room. “The keys to the music room and the theater are with the Office of Administrative Services,” he explains as Hokuto closes the door. “You’ll have to grab the key there and return it after every use. Come on.”

He leads Hokuto out of the club room building and into the path leading to the Office of Administrative Services. He doesn’t look back once to check if Hokuto is following, but the image of Hokuto is fresh in his mind. They’re still almost the same height, but Hokuto is definitely still attractive. And climbable. Like a motherfucking tree.

 _Stop,_ Taiga mentally reproaches himself.

They arrive at the Office of Administrative Services, where Taiga introduces Hokuto to the receptionist and explains to him how to access the keys. He logs in his name for this instance before leading the way to the music room.

The music room is in its usual order before the theater club would usually put it in disarray for rehearsals and sitzprobes. The floor is lined in hardwood, and the room is further soundproofed by black curtains. At the end of the room is a platform where the grand piano is situated.

“Well,” Taiga says, flicking the lights on, “this is it. The music room. Piano’s over there.”

Hokuto nods. “Thank you,” he says again.

It makes sense why Oba-senpai allowed Hokuto here. No two pianos are the same, even if they have the same manufacturer. The building admin will be bringing that piano to the theater for the show, so might as well Hokuto gets used to the feeling of playing the instrument as early as now, whether or not he gets to play. “Well then … I’ll be goin—”

“Would you like to stay for a bit?”

Taiga’s hand freezes on the doorknob. Sirens blare in his head, telling him to decline the offer. _I’d love to, but thanks. I’m supposed to catch up on my homework._ It would be much better for him to not let a boy he had liked since high school get to him.

“Sure.”

Hokuto runs a hand through the keys, the sound as gentle as his touch. Taiga makes his way to the front row of seats, settling on the front left, next to the aisle.

He’s been in this situation before, and he feels like watching Matsumura Hokuto play the piano is like watching a film he never wants to end. He isn’t the best pianist out there, but what Taiga enjoys about Hokuto’s piano playing is how he puts all the emotion into the performance. Taiga could tell from the emotions crossing Hokuto’s face.

Of course, Taiga isn’t going to get an emotional performance from Hokuto today. He’s testing the keys, familiarizing himself with playing the instrument, so he’s just playing basic songs, like Do-Re-Mi and Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.

Hokuto stops playing after a few minutes, much to Taiga’s disappointment. He closes the lid on the piano and stands up, looking at Taiga sheepishly. “I’m done. Sorry for taking your time.”

“It’s okay.” Taiga stands up, too, trying not to sound like he doesn’t want Hokuto’s impromptu performance to end. “You still got it, and you’ve gotten better.”

Hokuto glances up in surprise. “What?” He blinks.

 _Shit._ “I, uh,” he explains awkwardly, body itching to flee the scene. But, no. He should see through this. He and Hokuto would be working together under the same club again. “Well, you played piano in the theater club, and you were great. So. Uh. That’s all.”

The silence stretches between them for what feels like ages. Taiga wants to shoot himself in the foot for saying anything. What was he thinking? They weren’t friends before, and they definitely weren’t now. They were classmates and went to the same club—nothing more, nothing less. There was that one weekend, sure, but …

“I didn’t think you’d remember,” Hokuto speaks up at last. He’s not quite looking Taiga in the eye, but his lips form a barely visible smile. “It’s been a year.”

“Yeah, it has,” Taiga agrees softly.

Hokuto chuckles. “It feels long already. But yeah, I practiced a lot when I was in Seikei. And thanks for the compliment.”

“Anyway,” he clears his throat. “I guess I should be going. I have a consultation with my professor in half an hour, and I’d like to prepare. I’ll accompany you back to the club room?”

Disappointment stabs at Taiga’s heart. Just as he thought he was getting somewhere with Hokuto.

_People always leave or push you away._

“Kyomoto-kun?” Hokuto raises a brow, most likely wondering why Taiga has a stupid look on his face.

“Right.” Taiga snaps out of his daze. “Um, there’s no need. You go ahead. I’ll just return this to Administrative Services. But thanks for the offer.”

He leaves the music room even more lost than when Hokuto asked for a favor a couple of hours ago.

_“I have a question.”_

_Hokuto briefly takes his eye off the road to glance at him. “What?”_

_“What’s with the motorcycle? I didn’t imagine you to be a motorcycle driver type.”_

_Hokuto chuckles lightheartedly. “Because it’s more convenient. I don’t have to wait for the train to arrive or go through stations to get to my destination. And it’s quicker than a bike.”_

_“The quicker it is to get away, huh?”_

_“What?”_

_Taiga tightens his grip on Hokuto’s jacket and shakes his head. “Nothing. Nothing.”_

“ATTENTION!”

Taiga winces and covers his ears just as Kaoru does the same. “Jesus, senpai, keep your voice down,” Kaoru complains.

“Shut up. I’ll speak however loudly I want, minion.”

Takamina hides a smile behind her hand. “Aren’t you used to him yet?” she teases, sympathetically patting Kaoru on the shoulder.

Kaoru glares at the vice president. “I hope you skin him alive so you can take over.”

Takaki glares at her.

Hokuto looks as culture shocked as any other new member of the club. If he’s like Taiga, he’ll get used to it within another week.

“Anyway,” Takaki speaks again, grabbing the clipboard on his desk. “The reason I’ve gathered everyone today is I bring good news. Dean Matsumoto has approved the budget for our upcoming show. _Newsies_ is a go.”

The entire room cheers, and Taiga’s heart soars. He had watched _Newsies_ on Broadway, and he always wanted to become part of it.

“So, I’ll be having the Marketing and Partnerships team release all promo materials soon, and I’d love to have everyone help in sharing the call for auditions. As always, everyone is free to the audition, which will be screened by me, Dean Matsumoto, and a professor from the Fine Arts Department. Just sign up on the link on the event page and wait for audition details.”

“What role are you planning on auditioning for?” Kochi asks as the meeting adjourns.

Taiga stands up and slings his backpack on his shoulder. “Jack Kelly,” he answers. The main role. “For the _Santa Fe_ song.”

“Ah.” Kochi nods in understanding. “I’ll probably sit this one out and just do promotions. Good luck, though.”

Jack Kelly, the young newspaper boy from New York who wants to change the world. Taiga feels it in his bones. He’s going to be Jack Kelly, and he’ll do his best to make it happen.

As much as he’s curious about people’s love lives, Taiga ultimately knows are rumors are just rumors. Some of them end up being true, but others are groundless.

He should know. One time in senior year, a rumor had spread across the school claiming that Taiga was in love with his best friend Juri.

Of course, Taiga had heaved the moment he’d caught wind of the news. Him, in love with Juri? Please.

However, there’s one rumor that Taiga has known to be true for a long time now.

Matsumura Hokuto always leaves.

His friendship with Nakajima Kento and Kikuchi Fuma made him popular despite keeping to himself most of the time. Girls and boys alike were attracted to his handsome face and kind personality, and it didn’t surprise anyone whenever someone would ask Hokuto to meet them somewhere private or when he would open his locker and find love letters.

That’s the problem, though. Hokuto engaged in several romantic relationships over the course in high school, but none of them lasted for more than a few months. Some people guessed that he only agreed to go out with people to play with their emotions. Others speculated that maybe people were just attracted by his handsomeness, only to be scared off by Hokuto’s real, more sinister personality.

However, Taiga would beg to differ. Hokuto doesn’t seem evil or like a player—he’s just distant. He didn’t branch outside his small circle of friends. And while he was friendly and kind to the members of the theater club, things never went further than that. Taiga spoke with him a few times over the course of their high school years as classmates and clubmates, but in a strange, unexplainable way, it always felt like Hokuto never actually _saw_ him while they were talking.

One time, Taiga had overheard Nakajima and Kikuchi talking about Hokuto. It turns out, Hokuto had moved a lot when he was a kid, and his three years in high school would be the longest he had stayed in one place.

Going back and forth without ever staying too long? Taiga understands being left behind, with the way he would go home on most days and finding out his parents had flown to some country he can’t remember anymore.

Just like people said he would, Hokuto left. After graduation, he was on a train to Tokyo, without even saying goodbye to his classmates.

So yeah, Matsumura Hokuto always leaves, after all. No matter what.

“You’re not leaving yet?”

Taiga looks up and finds Hokuto looking at him curiously, backpack slung over his shoulder. The time on the clock hanging on the wall across him reads 8:28 pm. It’s already late at night, and the Excel spreadsheet before him isn’t making sense yet. But he has to submit the financials to Kaoru tomorrow for their proposed summer team building activity.

“I can’t. I have to finish this.”

“You can take your work at home,” Hokuto insists. “Come on, we can walk out together.”

Taiga’s heart leaps up to his throat. Here we go again. Had he actually learned from his past? He should say no right now. Tell Hokuto it’s okay—it’s not like he hasn’t stayed late by himself on campus before. Close that door that had been opened for a few days and end whatever might start. Matsumura Hokuto—everyone Taiga knows—always leaves, and it would be better if Taiga said no.

But, Taiga isn’t one to learn from past mistakes. He closes his laptop and shoves it in his bag. “Okay.”

They walk silently in a hallway void of people. Taiga sighs in relief when they finally step out of the building, squinting at the sudden burst of light from the lampposts. The campus is quiet, though he could spot a few people, presumably doing late-night work or on-campus dormers heading back before curfew.

The silence is awkward, and Taiga decides to speak out the first question that came to mind. “Do you still have your motorcycle?”

Not for the first time they’ve been together in recent weeks, Hokuto stiffens and turns slowly to face Taiga. “What?”

 _There it goes again._ “You used to have a black motorcycle,” Taiga points out quietly, wishing for a hole to appear and suck him into the ground. “I was just wondering if you still have it?”

Hokuto resumes his pace without saying anything. Taiga briefly considers going the other way and running away, but he decides against it.

“I still do,” Hokuto says once they make it down the steps of the club room building. He shrugs. “It still works fine, but I don’t use it to get to school. It’s a few minutes’ walk from my accommodation anyway.”

“I see,” Taiga replies awkwardly, not sure what he’s supposed to say.

They still have a long walk to go before reaching the campus gates. The rest of the stroll is spent in silence, but it’s suffocating Taiga. It’s unnerving being in the same space as the young man he shares an interesting history with. But it’s also mostly _puzzling_.

“Can we stop doing this?” Taiga blurts out as they walk past an intersection.

Hokuto still doesn’t meet his eyes. “Doing what?” he asks, voice smooth and void of any discomfort.

Taiga balls his hands into fists. “Acting like we don’t know each other.”

It feels like another eternity has passed before Hokuto breaks the silence. “Kyomoto-kun,” he sighs. “We _don’t_ know each other. We barely spoke to each other in high school, and one weekend doesn’t change that. We weren’t friends back then, and we aren’t exactly now either.”

“Why did you ask me to go with you that weekend?” Taiga challenges. He feels like he can’t look at Hokuto’s way, so he chooses to stare at the path ahead. “We weren’t friends, but you still asked me if I wanted to go. It was just the two of us for the weekend days, and now you’re gonna act like we were just classmates and clubmates who rarely talked to each other?”

“Kyomoto-kun,” Hokuto sighs again. “I don’t want to talk about it. I wasn’t in a good place at that time, and I’m sorry for dragging you in. Can we just forget about it?”

Harnessing all his self-control, Taiga manages to stop himself from strangling Hokuto on the spot. _No,_ he wants to yell. _I’m not about to just fucking forget about a weekend that have been haunting me for the past year. I’m not just about to move on until you give me answers._

Instead, his shoulders slump. “Fine,” he sniffs.

It only takes a few more minutes before they reach the campus gates. He’s more than ready to sprint away without looking back, but then a hand on his arm causes his brain to malfunction.

“I’m not asking to be friends,” Hokuto says. Taiga can’t quite sense the emotion in his voice, but it sort of sounded like a plea. “If we can at least get along, that’s all I’m asking for. I’m sorry if you think I’m being unreasonable, but I really would like to leave the past behind.”

Taiga scoffs. “Fuck you,” he spits, shaking Hokuto’s hand off and making a dash out of the campus gates.

His heart beats erratically as he jams his keys into his apartment door. The ghost of a hand remains on his arm, undeterred no matter how many times he tries to ignore it.

“Hey, what’s up?” Juri greets perkily. “I didn’t think you’d call until later.”

Taiga doesn’t have the patience, so he gets to the point. “Senior year, the week before finals,” he says. “Remember that?”

Juri hesitates on the other end. “You mean the weekend when you went missing and I almost killed you when you got back? Yeah, I sure as hell do,” he states monotonously.

Taiga fiddles with the hem of his shirt, breathes in deeply, and mutters, “I was with Matsumura Hokuto.”

He hears a dull clunk, which he assumes to be the sound of Juri dropping his phone. His suspicions were confirmed a few seconds later when he hears shuffling and Juri’s fuming voice demands, “What the actual fuck? Taiga, why didn’t you tell me? I can’t believe you hid this from me. Did you sleep with him? Is that why you never said anything? I swear—”

“I didn’t sleep with him,” Taiga interrupts softly. His fingers have shifted from fidgeting with the hem of his shirt to his collar, suddenly feeling like he can’t breathe. “Nothing happened. Nothing like that, at least.”

“Oh.” Juri pauses. “If nothing happened, why didn’t you tell me?”

“That’s the thing, though,” Taiga mutters thoughtfully. “Nothing happened, but something almost did.”

“Taiga, you’re not making any sense right now.”

“I let him get away, and now I think I’ve done it again,” Taiga responds vaguely.

Juri sighs in frustration. “Okay, Taiga. You’d better start from the top.”

_Takaki Yuya created a group chat with Takahashi Minami, Mitsumune Kaoru, Ohara Sakurako, Inoo Kei, Yamada Ryosuke, Kochi Yugo, Jesse Lewis, Oba Mina, Nakajima Yuto, Morimoto Shintaro, Takimoto Miori, Shimazaki Haruka, Tsuchiya Tao, Matsushima Sou, Shida Mirai, Yamada Ryosuke, Kawaguchi Haruna, and Marius Yo_

_Takaki Yuya changes the group name to KYOMOTO & MATSUMURA NOT ALLOWED_

**Takahashi Minami [9:41 pm]**

Takaki, please. I have too many group chats of you excluding other members

**Inoo Kei [9:42 pm]**

This better be good

**Takaki Yuya [9:42 pm]**

Oh it /is/ good

A freshman told me that the duo excluded from this group chat have a little something …

**Jesse Lewis [9:43 pm]**

That freshman is ME!!!

HAHAHAHA THANK YOU PRESIDENT

**Inoo Kei [9:43 pm]**

Kyomoto and Matsumura have a thing?

They barely talk to each other in the club room

**Jesse Lewis [9:44 pm]**

IKR

BUT

I left my laptop charger in the club room an hour ago and guess what??

I saw them leaving together!!

**Oba Mina [9:44 pm]**

Maybe they’re trying to be nice?

It’s late at night and either one of them were probably heading home at the same direction

**Takaki Yuya [9:45 pm]**

But ok get this

I checked their application forms

And

It turns out

They went to the same high school and theater club!

**Yamada Ryosuke [9:47 pm]**

Interesting …

**Shida Mirai [9:47 pm]**

So they might have a history?

**Takaki Yuya [9:48 pm]**

BINGO!!!

**Kochi Yugo [9:49 pm]**

Sorry, just catching up right now

Oh, Taiga left with Matsumura-kun?

Glad he’s finally making a move now

**Takaki Yuya [9:50 pm]**

WHAT

**Takahashi Minami [9:50 pm]**

WHAT

**Oba Mina [9:50 pm]**

WHAT

**Kochi Yugo [9:51 pm]**

Oh

Shit

**Takaki Yuya [9:51 pm]**

Kochi Yugo, what do you know about this???

As your president, I DEMAND TO KNOW

**Kochi Yugo [9:52 pm]**

Oh boy


	4. Chapter 4

_“Hey.” Hokuto’s voice is gentle. “We’re here.”_

_Taiga yawns, his efforts of trying not to sleep during the ride trying to get to him. When the sleepiness subsides, he takes in his surroundings. All he sees around them is green—trees, grass, and leaves. The only stark contrasts to the greenery are the blue sky and a small, traditional house in the middle of it all._

_Hokuto has already parked the motorcycle by the nearby tree and is heading up the gate. Taiga scrambles after him. “Is this your family’s?” he asks as Hokuto fits the key into the lock of the main entrance._

_“No, we’re breaking in,” Hokuto deadpans._

_Taiga shoots him an unconvinced glare._

_“Kidding.” Hokuto cracks a small smile. “It’s Kento’s family vacation spot. They said we could hang out here whenever we want.”_

_Taiga hides his grimace at the mention of Hokuto’s friends. While he doesn’t have negative feelings toward Nakajima and Kikuchi, they’re a reminder of the distance between him and Hokuto. Taiga only has Juri, while Hokuto’s friends with the cool kids._

_“Hey,” Hokuto calls. He already has the door open and has walked in the hallway. “You coming in?”_

_It’s still not too late to turn back, Taiga thinks. If he had a better sense of self-preservation, he’d apologize for the inconvenience and find a way back home._

_But Taiga is Taiga, so he nods and steps inside._

Taiga steps out of the theater, heart still beating fast but feeling less burdened than he was in the past couple of weeks. He had finished his audition for _Newsies_ , and not to brag, but he feels damn good about it. He hit the right notes, barely screwed up during the dance part of the audition, and he poured all his emotion and swag when reading Jack Kelly’s lines.

He’s claiming it already—he’s going to be Jack Kelly.

His high spirits leave him, though, the moment he reaches the club room. He was about to tell everyone how his audition went, when he realizes that there were only two people in the room.

Kawaguchi Haruna from the Training and Development team is leaning against the wall with a thermos in her hand, tossing her head back gracefully as she laughs with Matsumura Hokuto.

Kawaguchi Haruna is pretty, Taiga supposes. She doesn’t have model-like proportions, but she borders on the cute side. She has bangs that make her look like that some female idol he can’t remember, has a sweet personality, and serves like a sister to him and the other sophomores in the club. So all in all, he understands why people are attracted to her.

But at the same time … _why her?_

“Why are you staring at me like that?” Haruna asks, peering at Taiga, seated at the other side of the club room, staring at her without blinking. “What’s wrong with you today, Taiga?”

“I don’t get it,” Taiga sighs dramatically.

Haruna frowns. “Get what?”

It all started when Taiga walked in on Haruna and Hokuto laughing together in the club room. It was also a couple of weeks after Taiga told Hokuto to fuck off.

Since then, Taiga has kept a close eye on every interaction between Hokuto and Haruna. Sometimes it’s just their greetings when they are in the same room. Other times it’s Hokuto telling Haruna she looks lovely. And then, there was one time when Hokuto asked if they could go to the campus café to grab something to drink.

Sure, they seem friendly right now, but for all Taiga knows, friendships could bloom into something more.

Next to Haruna, freshman Marius Yo mutters under his breath, “I think Kyomoto-senpai’s lost his marbles.”

“Oh, he has,” Haruna whispers back. “He has his thinking face on, and that usually backfires on him.”

“I can perfectly hear you guys from here!”

With a frustrated sigh, Haruna gets up and heads to the door. “I’m gonna go to the bathroom.”

Kaoru, who had been watching the exchange in the seat across Taiga, flicks him on the forehead. “Okay, what is up with you today? You’re already annoying as it is, but you’ve cranked up five times as annoying. Did something happen?”

“Well …” Taiga trails off, not sure how to express his emotions. “I’m just … stressed, that’s all. Schoolwork, waiting for audition results, and Juri’s been busy with his workload, so …”

Kaoru’s expression turns more concerned. “You know you can tell me anything, right?”

Of all the things Taiga was expecting to come out of her mouth, he wasn’t expecting such straightforwardness. As sarcastic Kaoru can be to him, she genuinely does care for him as a junior, friend, and brother figure. It’s also easy for her to tell that Taiga hasn’t been quite himself for a while now.

Suddenly, feeling guilty over being so petty over a non-issue, Taiga offers her a wide grin. “I’m fine, senpai. Things haven’t been easy, but I’ve got you.”

Kaoru doesn’t look convinced. Instead, she pats Taiga on the head. “Okay, but my offer’s on the table.”

Taiga salutes. “Yes, ma’am.”

**_SUBJECT:_ ** _Your Audition Status: Newsies_

_Dear Kyomoto Taiga-san,_

_It is our pleasure to announce that the selection committee has been impressed by your auditions and is offering you the role of **Jack Kelly** for the Theater Club’s production of Newsies!_

_Attached is the production calendar. Kindly block all rehearsal days. We will be having a get-to-know session on **May 18** at the **Department of Fine Arts Studio B**._

_Thank you, and once again, congratulations!_

**Theater Club Core Team**

**President Takaki [6:48 pm]**

ALRIGHT CONGRATS TO KYOMOTO, OHARA, JESSE, AND MORIMOTO FOR LANDING ROLES IN NEWSIES!

**VP Takamina [6:49 pm]**

Congrats, you all! (((o(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)o)))

**Mitsumune – Finance Head [6:50 pm]**

Yeah, the lead couple’s from my team! o((*^▽^*))o

**Ohara – Finance Team [6:51 pm]**

Thank you, senpai! Ｏ(≧▽≦)Ｏ

**Taiga – Finance Team [6:51 pm]**

Are we getting free drinks, Kaoru-senpai?

**Mitsumune – Finance Head [6:51 pm]**

Suck it, Kyomoto, you’re not of legal age yet

**Taiga – Finance Team [6:52 pm]**

(︶︹︺)

**President Takaki [6:52 pm]**

Anywayyyyy

Since we’re celebrating, I’m reminding everyone that our monthly team dinner and karaoke night will be happening tomorrow!

[Event Attached]

RSVP yea or nay so I know which room I’ll book

Hopefully the freshmen can come

Also you, Matsumura, since you’re new and we haven’t had a welcome party for you yet

**Matsumura – Logistics [6:55 pm]**

I’m not sure yet, but I’ll get back to you later.

**President Takaki [6:56]**

Ok

Well, everyone, let me know by tomorrow!

_“I have a question.” Taiga rests on his elbows and leans forward on the cabin’s mahogany dining table._

_Hokuto doesn’t look up from his book. “Go ahead,” he replies as he flips a page._

_It’s quite annoying how Hokuto’s so calm about everything. Taiga reaches over and, like a brat, pries the book out of Hokuto’s hands. “Why do you always leave?” he asks softly._

_Without the book distracting him, Hokuto is forced to look at Taiga in the eye. They’re stuck in a stalemate for god knows how long until Hokuto clears his throat. “Where’d you hear that from?”_

_Taiga shrugs. “People talk, you know. I usually take rumors with a grain of salt, but this one seems to be true. You don’t seem to like staying with someone for a long time, I’ve noticed.”_

_“Really?” Hokuto replies wryly. “I didn’t realize you know so much about me.”_

_Taiga shrugs again. “Well,” he says, trying to keep his voice even. “It’s hard not to notice you.”_

_It’s too late when he realizes the effects of what he just said. Taiga ducks his head, hoping that Hokuto doesn’t see the redness in his cheeks._

_Hokuto lets out a long sigh. “I guess …” he says softly, almost shyly, “I guess I’ve never found a place I want to stay for long.”_

_“So, you end up leaving them instead?”_

_“Yeah,” Hokuto replies curtly. He extends his arm and takes his book back, his gaze back on the page. “Something along those lines.”_

Kochi slaps Taiga eagerly on the back. “Shut down that Excel sheet and let’s go already!”

“Yeah, yeah,” he says, unable to hide his smile. He closes his laptop and shoves his things into his bag, following Kochi, Jesse, and Shintaro out of the club room.

“Man, I can’t believe Takaki-senpai booked us something fancy,” Shintaro remarks as he steps into the elevator.

Taiga is about to reply, but he pats down his pocket and is met with nothing. “Oh, shit. I left my phone in the club room.”

“Should we hold the door, senpai?” Jesse asks. “If you run, it shouldn’t take too long.”

“Nah, you go ahead.” Taiga waves a hand casually. “I’ll meet you in the lobby.”

“Elevator sucks, but okay!”

It doesn’t take long for Taiga to grab his phone at the desk. At this point, the club room is deserted. Even Yamada and Nakajima, who usually stay behind on this day, left a bit ago. Taiga hums a song from _Newsies_ as he waits for the elevator, mindlessly browsing through Twitter to kill time.

Taiga breathes a sigh of relief when the elevator, which the administrator needs to fix because it’s so goddamn slow, finally arrives—empty and entirely his.

Just as the doors are about to close, though, a hand lurches out and forces them back open. Hokuto rapidly hurries in, breathless and panting.

“Oh.” He blinks when he realizes he’s not alone. He’s still catching his breath, but his posture is stiff now. “Um, hi, Kyomoto-kun.”

“Hi,” Taiga says through grinded teeth, avoiding eye contact.

He goes back to his phone, busying himself by scrolling through Twitter. That’s the most conversation they’ve had since their walk that night, and Taiga isn’t so keen on adding to it. Or, honestly, he doesn’t know what he should say.

But, Hokuto surprises him. “Mitsumune-san mentioned you’ve been out of it recently,” he suddenly speaks up.

Taiga snaps his head up that he ends up seeing stars. “She said what?”

Hokuto shrugs. “She thinks there’s something wrong with you, but you don’t feel like telling her.”

Taiga feels unreasonably angry that Kaoru had to tell not Kochi or Jesse or Shintaro—but Matsumura Hokuto of all people. “Well, I’ve had a lot on my plate these past few days.”

“She’s probably just worried about you,” Hokuto says softly.

Of course, Taiga knows that, but that doesn’t make him feel any less self-conscious right now. “Whatever,” he grumbles. It’s one thing to say he cares about Kaoru, but it’s another to not just feel the slightest bit petty.

“You didn’t RSVP to the club dinner,” Taiga blurts out the next thing that comes to mind. “Are you coming or not?”

Hokuto hesitates. “I don’t know,” he admits quietly. “I don’t think I fit in there just yet.”

He’s right. Hokuto has been talking to a few club members, but he hasn’t reached the level of familiarity in which he can casually insult other members. And with this rate, Taiga doesn’t think Hokuto will ever.

He sighs reluctantly. “I think you should come.”

Taiga could have sworn Hokuto’s eyes lit up, only for them to dim milliseconds later. “No, I think it would be better if I didn’t.” Hokuto shakes his head. “You guys are close, and I don’t want to intrude.”

 _Well, tough luck._ Taiga smiles dryly. “Come to the club dinner. I mean it.”

“I don’t—”

“You told me before you never found a place you want to stay for long,” Taiga interrupts coldly. “I don’t know about you, but not interacting with us won’t make that task easy. So join us. Maybe you’ll belong, maybe you won’t, but at least you’ll have tried.”

The elevator finally reaches the ground floor. Taiga quickly walks out without waiting for an answer, plastering a smile when he nears his friends.

**Theater Club Core Team**

**Matsumura – Logistics [5:44 pm]**

Sorry for the late reply.

It’s a yes for me

**President Takaki [5:45 pm]**

*yea

**Matsumura – Logistics [5:45 pm]**

Oh.

It’s a *yea for me.

**President Takaki [5:46 pm]**

That’s the spirit (=´∀`)人(´∀‘=)

Taiga has been part of the theater club for only a year, but he has already seen many weird things. He’s witnessed questionable hair changes and outfits, as well as caught couples making out.

He thinks he’s seen it all. He’s grown used to their club’s shenanigans, except that this is the first time he’s seen Inoo angrily ranting about the injustice the karaoke machine had served him.

“90? What the fuck? I NAILED that Eminem song and now you’re saying I can’t rap for shit like Takaki?”

“And there he goes again,” Kochi chuckles, rolling his eyes in amusement. He flops down against Taiga’s side. “Sometimes, I wonder why we insist on karaoke when we always know what happens.”

Hokuto, who’s seated at Kochi’s other side, raises a brow. “What always happens?”

Taiga, who already has his share of singing and is now nursing a glass of iced tea, snorts. “Just wait for the chaos to unfold. It’s something else.”

“Um.” Hokuto glances over to Takaki and Inoo. By this time, Yabu Kota, Yamada Ryosuke, and Nakajima Yuto have joined the squabble. “Should I be concerned?”

“Lighten up, Matsumura-kun.” Kochi chuckles. “It’s just pure fun at the theater club.”

Just as he says that, Takaki lets out a whoop, and Inoo screams like a banshee. Luckily the other members manage to restrain him before Inoo lunges for Takaki.

“Wow,” Hokuto whistles lowly. “You guys really are something.”

“You can say that again,” Taiga remarks wryly.

Soon, Kochi disappears to join the juniors when a Backstreet Boys song starts playing. The chaos of the karaoke room fades to the background when he and Hokuto find themselves staring at each other, neither knowing what to say or do.

“You’re getting sleepy. Do you want me to take you home?”

It’s tempting, considering that he’s about to fall asleep. But he shakes his head because he doesn’t know where he and Hokuto stand. “I think it would be better if that didn’t happen,” he replies distantly.

Hokuto, however, is firm. “I’ll walk you halfway, then?”

Taiga shakes his head. “Please stop trying, Matsumura,” he says resignedly. “I told myself I’d give up on you a year ago, and look how well I’m doing with that.”

Once again, Taiga leaves Hokuto behind.

Taiga had just breathed in fresh air after stepping out of the karaoke place when he hears a voice behind him.

“Taiga, wait up!”

He looks over his shoulder and freezes on his tracks. “Haruna-chan?” he chokes out.

Kawaguchi Haruna smiles at her, slinging her bag over her shoulder. “Heading home? Me, too. Come on.”

It turns out that their accommodations are in the same direction, though Haruna’s is nearer. It will just take them a ten-minute walk, and after that, Taiga can’t wait to flop into his bed.

“Hey, Haruna-chan?” Taiga speaks up on impulse. “Can I tell you something?”

She looks at him, expression concerned. “Everything okay?”

That’s an excellent question, and the short answer is no. The long answer? Well, that would take forever to explain, and Taiga only has less than ten minutes.

Also, fuck crushes. His friendships will always mean more than a stupid crush from the past.

Fuck Matsumura Hokuto, really.

“I just want you to know that I know about your thing for Matsumura and that I support it. You two would be good together.”

Haruna stops on her tracks, then blinks slowly. “What did you say?” she demands quietly.

Taiga gulps. “Um, I think it’s cool and all you have a thing for Matsumura? I give you the stamp of approval?”

He doesn’t expect Haruna to stifle her giggles with her mouth. “Taiga,” she says once she has calmed down. “What gave you the idea? I don’t like Matsumura-kun like that.”

Taiga stares at her as if a giraffe just popped out from behind her. “You don’t?”

Haruna chuckles and nods. “I like him as a person, but it’s not what you’re thinking.”

“Oh.” Taiga pauses to think that over. Is it wrong that he feels kind of … relieved? “Huh.”

“Well, aren’t you glad that’s sorted out?” Haruna pats Taiga on the arm. “Come on, let’s go home.”

It takes a few seconds for Taiga to register what Haruna said before following suit, a spring in his step.


	5. Chapter 5

**Juri [4:55 pm]**

Hey, Taiga!

I’m really really really sorry, but something’s come up and I can’t come to Saitama this weekend. :(

I know I promised to see you to celebrate, but this is a really busy time at uni

Plus I just got a part-time job and my boss is forcing me to work extra hours -_-

But the second I figure out when I’m free, I’m visiting, I promise!

**Seen 4:57 pm**

The first time Taiga had met Juri, they’d been small, wide-eyed third graders who ended up sitting next to each other. He very clearly remembers walking into an intimidating-looking boy staring at him, though said boy instantly breaks into a smile when Taiga had sat down.

“Hi! I’m Taiga!” Taiga had greeted, then forward and outgoing. He had stuck out a hand for the boy to shake.

A warm, steady hand had clasped his. “Juri,” he had replied. “Nice to meet you.”

The rest, as they said, is history. It’s always Taiga and Juri, Juri and Taiga, whatever floats their boat. Family trips were never complete without one of them inviting the other. They practically live in each other’s houses due to their numerous sleepovers, mostly because Taiga’s parents are always away.

Kids at school always picked on Taiga because he was the only student who showed up without parents during family activities. From that point on, Juri had always vowed to protect him. When Juri wasn’t beating people up, he had taught Taiga how to stand up for himself. At the same time, Taiga helped Juri tone down the intimidation in instances it wasn’t required. (Because sometimes that school bully needed a fist connected to his face, okay?)

Since then, he knew that they would always be there whenever they needed each other.

Well, at least it worked that way until after high school graduation.

So now, with Juri in another city, busy with his new life and his new girlfriend. Taiga’s not sure what his purpose in his best friend’s life is anymore.

_“If you weren’t a girl, you’d be trying to talk with a first in your mouth.”_

_“I said that I worked for the Sun, and I did. I told you my professional name was Plumber, and it is. You never asked my real one.”_

_“I wouldn’t think I had to unless I knew I was dealing with a backstabber.”_

_“And if I was a boy, you’d be looking at me through one swollen eye.”_

_“Don’t let that stop ya. Gimme your best shot.”_

Taiga nears his face toward Sakurako. She was supposed to grab him by the collar and kiss him full on the lips, as the script dictated.

But Sakurako’s red in the face, biting her bottom lip.

“Okay, cut,” Takaki declares. He sighs, but it isn’t out of frustration. He stands up from his seat in the theater and looks up from where Taiga and Sakurako were standing—a multi-level set that is supposed to depict the slums where the newsies of New York sleep. They’re at the topmost level—the rooftop—and while Taiga’s used to heights, his companion was shaking throughout.

And she looks nervous about the kiss scene, too.

“Ohara-chan,” Takaki calls from the stage below, “I understand you’re nervous, so don’t force yourself on the kiss. But you have two kiss scenes in this musical, so you need to work around it eventually, alright?”

“Y-Yes, senpai.”

“Kyomoto, you might want to help her with that.” Takaki waggles his brows, to which Taiga rolls his eyes.

There’s a sudden slam on the piano keys, and Taiga jumps. He looks to the direction or the orchestra, where he spots Hokuto sitting, looking like he had just slammed his fingers on the keys.

“You okay there, Matsumura?” Takamina, the assistant director for the musical, asks with a concerned expression.

Taiga could have sworn Hokuto gulps. “Sorry. Just a slip of the fingers.”

“Riiiight.” Takaki nods. “Well, we can skip the kiss and continue with the script. Remember, you’re performing _Something to Believe in_ next.”

“I’ve never … kissed anyone before, senpai.” Sakurako buries her face in her hands in an attempt to hide her face. “Sorry, but you have to know.”

They’re safe on solid ground when they had this conversation. They’ve wrapped up rehearsals, and most of them are heading to class. Taiga was about to head home, maybe try calling Juri again, when Sakurako stops him and asks for a few minutes of his time.

Taiga’s had his share of on-stage kisses, and it took some work with his partner to get to a certain level of comfort. For Sakurako, who is just about to have her first kiss, the thought may be overwhelming.

“Look, I get it,” he says, patting her head. “But we need to make this work. Are you still in on this?”

Sakurako looks up and nods quickly.

Taiga grins. “Good. The first thing we need to do is get comfortable around each other. We could spend a day rehearsing lines then maybe try to talk to Takaki-senpai how to get around it without making us both uncomfortable.”

Her shoulders loosen up, and she smiles. “Okay.”

They set a meeting at the campus café on Saturday. Sakurako looks more relaxed as they part ways. Taiga would, too, but he has a phone call to make.

“Hello, this is Tanaka Juri! I’m probably busy right now, so call back later!”

As it turns out, facing his fears is not that easy.

_“Fuck!”_

_Taiga withdraws his hand from the cutting board. A sickening feeling twists his stomach as he notices droplets of blood on the kitchen tiles and a knife with reddened edges on the cutting board._

_“Oh my god,” Hokuto breathes, rushing over to reach for Taiga’s hand. There’s a long cut running diagonally across Taiga’s palm. It doesn’t look too deep, but the sight of blood makes him nauseous. “What just happened?” Hokuto asks, quickly grabbing the nearest roll of paper towels, pressing them down on Taiga’s injured hand._

_Taiga hisses and tries to pull away, but Hokuto’s grip is too firm. “I … spaced out,” he admits, feeling his face warm up._

_Hokuto sighs. “I’ll get the first-aid kit,” he murmurs, pulling away. “Go sit down in the living room.”_

_Fortunately, the cut isn’t that bad. Taiga winces at the sting of the disinfectant, but Hokuto shushes him with an “It’s okay” before wrapping a bandage around the palm. “I don’t think you’ll need stitches, but I’m not a doctor, so don’t take my word for it,” Hokuto says._

_“Duly noted.”_

_Taiga looks up from his finger, and only then does he notice how close they are to each other, a fact that he hadn’t realized earlier because he’d been focused on his wound. Hokuto doesn’t seem to care, humming as he inspects the wrapping job on Taiga’s hand. Their faces are mere inches from each other now, and it would be so easy to …_

_Hokuto looks up, and suddenly it becomes too real …_

_“S-Sorry.” Hokuto scrambles far from Taiga. “I’ll take the cooking from here. You rest up.”_

_“I’m not_ that _injured,” Taiga calls, amusement laced in his tone._

_“Rest!”_

_Hokuto manages to do an excellent job, and Taiga probably would have fucked it up, injury or no injury. Taiga makes a point to clear his plate._

“Okay, so we’ve pretty much established that Jack and Katherine didn’t start in good terms.”

They’re in the campus café, seated in the seats by the window. It’s getting hotter, and Taiga had ditched his usual sweater for a shirt and a jacket. Sakurako, meanwhile, looks adorable in her pink spring dress and sandals.

She nods, scribbling some notes on her script. “She’s rich, so she initially didn’t want to date a newsie,” she adds. “Besides, she’s working on her writing career and doesn’t have time to think about romance.”

“So for the first few scenes, you have to channel contempt toward Jack … toward me,” Taiga explains. “But for the next scenes …”

“Katherine will see Jack as someone she needs for her article. But eventually, it’s his charisma that gets to her.” Sakurako grins. “Then, they form a bond that eventually becomes romantic.”

Taiga nods, happy that they’re doing great so far. “Okay, so I’ve been thinking,” he says. “We can do a stage kiss instead.”

She blinks. Taiga remembers that this is her first time in theater, so theater terms are new to her. “What’s … that?”

“We make it look like we’re kissing, but we aren’t.” Taiga reaches for his coffee mug and takes a sip. “You’re gonna grab me by the collar, and we push our faces together so that it looks like we’re kissing, but we actually aren’t.”

“That’s …” Sakurako leans against her seat. “I never thought of that before.”

“I mean, look, you’re cute, and I’m sure you want your first kiss to be special. And I wouldn’t want you to be uncomfortable either.”

A smile spreads to her face. “Thanks, Kyomoto-senpai. You have no idea how I’m relieved to hear that. I …” Redness spreads across her cheeks. “I kind of like someone, so …” She puts her hands on her lap. “Senpai, have you liked someone so bad you thought you might burst?”

Only one person comes to mind, and Taiga mentally shakes his head. “Uh,” he says dumbly, “I think so.”

“Yeah, so I’m planning to ask him out, and hopefully things turn out well, but I’m kind of a chicken to do it. What if he rejects me, you know?”

“What if he doesn’t?” Taiga asks, feeling like a hypocrite for never following his own advice. “You wouldn’t know until you try.”

Sakurako sighs. “I guess so.” She reaches for her smoothie and takes a sip. “Well, maybe I’ll follow your advice. Thank you, senpai.”

 _Yup, he’s a hypocrite._ Taiga hopes his smile doesn’t come out of a grimace. “Anytime.”

**Ohara Sakurako [7:55 pm]**

Kyomoto-senpai!

I just wanna let you know

I took your advice

And

WE’RE GOING ON A DATE! o(≧∇≦o)

Thank you so much for the encouragement

**Kyomoto Taiga [7:59 pm]**

Look at you!

I’m so proud

Make sure to give him a ticket

Can’t wait to meet him~ 乂❤‿❤乂

**Ohara Sakurako [8:01 pm]**

Roger that!

After days upon days of radio silence, Juri finally picks up his phone.

“Hello?” he asks. “Taiga? What’s going on? Everything okay?”

 _About damn time you picked up,_ Taiga thinks fondly. “Yeah, everything’s fine. I just missed you a lot.”

“Oh.” Juri sighs. “I miss you a lot, too. Sorry I didn’t make it the last time.”

“Hey, no worries,” Taiga insists, ignoring the acrimonious voice in his head, reminding him of how he’d book a nice restaurant and a trip to the Railway Museum in anticipation of his best friend’s visit.

The background noise distracts Taiga, but Juri’s voice interrupts before he could ask. “How’s, um, everything with Matsumura going?”

Taiga’s fingers unconsciously tighten around his phone. How, indeed, is Hokuto doing? Taiga wouldn’t know, considering they haven’t spoken to each other except when they need to during rehearsals. He’s not particularly looking forward to talking to Hokuto ever since karaoke night.

“I really could do without his stupid face and be reminded of how dumb I was in high school,” Taiga replies grimly.

Juri laughs. “Having a crush on him didn’t make you dumb, Taiga. You already were anyway.”

“Wow, thanks, way to be a supportive best friend.” Taiga deadpans.

There it goes again—the noise. It sounded like people talking in the background. “Juri …” he says slowly. “Are you outside?”

“Oh, yeah!” Juri replies brightly. “Went for some grocery shopping.”

“Oh.” Then, it’s not the background noise bothering him, but it’s the fact that Juri’s voice seems to echo from one ear to the next … as if he’s nearby.

“Tanaka, stop standing there! The bus is about to leave!”

That voice, though unfamiliar, is within Taiga’s earshot. He lowers his phone and looks around, finding the source instantly. It’s from a tall man wearing shades and a jacket bearing the familiar colors of Keio University. Said man puts his arms around someone with a familiar tuft of pink hair wearing the same-colored jacket.

Tanaka Juri. His best friend. Is within a few feet away from him in Saitama. He’s not holding any grocery bags.

And Taiga never knew until now. Heck, he was pretty sure he wasn’t going to find out, with Juri’s bus leaving.

“T-Taiga.” Juri’s eyes widen as he steps forward. “I-I can explain—”

Slowly, Taiga closes his eyes and counts to five, even taking a few deep breaths just in case. “I hope you have a safe trip back to Tokyo. The next time I see you, I will actually murder you, Tanaka Juri.”

“Taiga, wait—”

“Goodbye,” Taiga interrupts, backing off before breaking into a sprint in the opposite direction.

If that situation didn’t summarize the current status of his friendship with Juri, he doesn’t know what does.

Just beside the theater club room is a fire exit. It’s big enough to fit three people, so sometimes students go out there to chitchat, have a quick smoke, or make out with someone. In the theater club, the only people who use the fire exit are Takaki and Takamina, usually when they want to discuss something important before relaying it to the rest of the club.

So it comes as a surprise to everyone—including Taiga—when he storms toward the fire exit after a meeting and loudly slams the door behind him.

He sinks to one of the steps. Gulping, he opens his phone to the message he had firmly avoided reading since last night.

**Tanaka Juri [9:20 pm]**

Taiga

I know I’ve been a shitty best friend recently, and I’m sorry for that

I feel like I keep apologizing to you without doing something to change things, and that’s all my fault

Our class went to Saitama for some research

I wanted to surprise you and drop by your uni, but the research took longer than I expected so I thought I wouldn’t catch a quick moment with you

Some best friend I am, huh

I understand if you don’t want to talk to me for a while

But just know that you’re still one of the most important people in my life

Taiga sighs, locking his phone and burying it in his pocket. _One of the most important people_ , huh? That’s part of the problem.

“You okay?”

Taiga’s ready to snap at whoever’s interrupting him when, no, he’s definitely not okay because he’s sitting in the fire exit and hiding his face in his hands. Annoyed, he lifts his head, and the spiteful words are on the tip of his tongue, only to disappear when he sees who’s looking at him.

It’s Matsumura Hokuto.

“You okay?” Hokuto repeats softly.

“The fuck does it look like?” Taiga huffs, looping his arms around his knees.

Hokuto is unfazed by Taiga’s tetchy remark. Casually, he holds out a can of pudding shake in front of him. “Want one?” he asks.

“What makes you think I like pudding shake?” Taiga grumbles.

Hokuto shrugs. “Kaoru-senpai told me you might,” he points out.

Taiga thinks about it. Kaoru had given him a can of pudding shake when he felt particularly stressed over one exam. _Damn you, Matsumura,_ he thinks resentfully as he snatches the can from Hokuto’s fingers.

It would have been the cue for Hokuto to go back inside, but he surprises Taiga by leaning against the railing, facing him.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Hokuto asks. The fire exit is narrow that their feet are practically brushing, enough to send Taiga’s nerves on edge.

Maybe he’s unreasonable, but Taiga can’t help but snap. “What makes you think I’d talk to you of all people? Didn’t you insist that we don’t know each other?”

Hokuto doesn’t flinch, but his eyes widen slightly. “I didn’t mean it like that,” he whispers in embarrassment.

Taiga huffs. “Then why would you say it?”

“I …” Hokuto begins, only for his shoulders to sag. “I don’t know.”

A year is enough for Taiga to come up with several things to say. He could yell at Hokuto and let him know how Taiga had felt forgotten. He could ask every question to finally get the answers he had wanted for so long.

Out of all these options, he chooses none of them.

“I miss Juri,” Taiga admits quietly. “I miss him a lot, and I’m scared he’s going to forget about me, and I won’t know who I am anymore.”

Hokuto tilts his head to the side. For a moment, Taiga bitterly wonders what Hokuto would know about missing someone. All he does is leave, anyway.

Another voice in his head argues that maybe Hokuto knows all too well.

“I remember him,” Hokuto remarks. “You two are inseparable.”

Taiga can’t help but crack a small smile at the use of the present tense. “He’s in Keio right now,” he says lightly. “Got a part-time job and a girlfriend, too.”

“Keio’s less than a couple of hours away,” Hokuto points out. “You two can easily see each other if you wanted.”

Taiga shrugs and hugs his knees to his chest. “We could, but we haven’t found the time lately.”

“You mean _he_ hasn’t found the time?”

Taiga refuses to respond to that.

Hokuto sighs, the look on his face pensive as he looks past Taiga and whatever it is on the building walls. “I remember you two getting scolded for always talking during class. The teachers had to change seating arrangements, but you always found a way to talk to each other.”

Taiga flushes.

“There was one time,” Hokuto continues, “Fuma had a crush on you for a bit. I think that was in our second year. He was considering asking you out, but he chickened out. He thought you liked Juri.”

“What?” Taiga screeches. “ _Me_? Liking _Juri_? Nope.” He shakes his head aggressively. “Hell no. Never. Absolutely not. Please don’t say that again, or else I might have to kill you.”

A small smile crosses Hokuto’s lips. “I’ll keep that in mind,” he chuckles. “I always had a feeling you two were best friends more than anything else.”

It’s happening again—him and Hokuto talking like they know each other too well. Taiga takes a deep breath, his palms screaming from the pressure his nails are applying to them. “Besides, there was someone else I liked.”

There it is—Taiga finally tells the truth. Or, at least half of it.

Hokuto breathes out. “I know.”

Oh.

Oh _shit_.

Taiga stares up, completely slack-jawed. Hokuto gazes back at him, his mouth forming a thin line. “Does that answer your question?”

Taiga can’t move, nor does he know what to say. His mind has gone so blank he doesn’t think he could say anything no matter how hard he tries.

“Don’t worry about it,” Hokuto sighs. “It was a long time ago, and it’s not like I’m holding it against you. I guess I just didn’t know how to react.”

His grimace deepens before he schools his expression into something neutral. “But it’s all in the past. I’m sorry if I’ve made you uncomfortable since I’ve arrived. But, now that we’ve cleared the air, I’ll try not to anymore.”

Taiga resists the urge to scream. He hasn’t budged an inch, and all he can think of at the moment is that _Matsumura Hokuto knows. He knew all this time._

Hokuto closes his eyes. “I want to take your advice. Try and mingle with everybody and see if the club is where I belong. While I’m doing that, I’d like for us to at least be friends.”

“Why?” Taiga demands. “Because I don’t have a crush on you anymore? Since there’s no more chance of me making a move?”

Hokuto shakes his head, remorse crossing his face. “I wanted to get to know you better in high school, too. It’s just that I had too much baggage, and I still do. So now, I want to take this chance to be your friend this time around.”

Taiga knows that the right answer is _no_. The smart choice would be to tell Hokuto no. That door shut a year ago.

But Taiga isn’t exactly known for making the right decisions. “Okay,” he agrees, squeezing his eyes shut. “Let’s be friends.”

When he opens his eyes, Hokuto is smiling as he pushes himself off the railing. “I’ll leave you alone for now. But, thank you for your kindness when you have every right to hate me.” He dips his head.

 _Trust me, I wish I did._ “No problem,” Taiga says weakly.

Right as Hokuto opens the fire exit door and sets a foot back inside, he stops and looks over his shoulder. “For what it’s worth, Kyomoto-kun,” he says, causing Taiga to jerk his head toward him.

Hokuto grins remorsefully. “I used to like you, too.”

The door closes behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dun dun dun dun


	6. Chapter 6

The next day, the universe decides to make Taiga’s life more challenging.

June means midterms, and the entire university is packed with students trying to get some studying done. Taiga had ventured into the library and the study hall of various buildings to find all of them full.

His last option before deciding to return to his apartment—or go to an off-campus coffee shop—is the campus café.

All tables are taken, and just as Taiga is about to leave, he spots Hokuto occupying a two-seater table, his gaze flitting from his laptop to his textbook. After Hokuto’s confession the day before, Taiga would rather go outside than share a space with Hokuto.

But Taiga is Taiga and decides against his better judgment.

“Um, hi, do you mind if I share a table with you?”

Hokuto looks up from his textbook, his eyes widening. Taiga could have sworn there’s a pink tint on his cheeks. “Oh, Kyomoto-kun,” he greets. “No, not at all.” He sets aside his pencil case. “Go ahead.”

“Thank you.”

“Midterms?” Hokuto asks, looking sympathetic as Taiga sets up his gear.

Taiga grunts in reply. “Plus a paper,” he answers, fishing out his wallet.

Hokuto nods as if feeling his pain. “I won’t bother you, then.”

True to his word, Hokuto’s focus is on his schoolwork. Fortunately, Taiga isn’t the least bit distracted, sighing in relief once he has finished his paper and submitted it to his professor. He still has a couple of exams within the week, but he could use a break.

Just as he closes his laptop, he realizes that Hokuto has done the same. He’s now sipping what looks like another cup of coffee. Taiga didn’t even notice Hokuto leave the table. “Taking a break?” Hokuto asks.

“Yeah.” Taiga leans against his chair, stretching his arms.

“Have you spoken to Tanaka yet?”

Suddenly, Taiga is all too aware of the phone in his pocket. Since Juri’s apology text, Taiga’s received a few other messages. He only fleetingly looked at them without replying, not knowing what to say to Juri’s attempts at starting a conversation. A small part of him feels spiteful pleasure for giving Juri a taste of his own medicine, but the more sensible parts of him point out how unfair he’s being. Refusing to reply doesn’t make the situation right, especially when the whole problem was a lack of communication in the first place.

Maybe he should tell Juri exactly how he feels instead of leaving his best friend on read, but …

“Not really,” Taiga sighs, gripping at his hair with his fingers. “I feel like the only way to make this right is to talk, but I just don’t know how to do that.”

Squeezing his eyes shut, Taiga lowers his head to the table. He can feel tears threatening to fall and tries his best to suppress them. What the fuck is wrong with him—he and Juri had been friends for almost forever. They both still want to be friends, so what’s holding him back?

Something touches his hair. Taiga lifts his head enough to see Hokuto smile gently as he ruffles Taiga’s head like he’s a puppy. “Your feelings are valid, Kyomoto-kun,” he says. “And it’s normal not to know what to say. Anyway, I think the first step is to say hi, then wing it from there.”

“Trust me, you are so, so lucky to have a best friend for life.” Hokuto withdraws his hand, shrugging evenly. Taiga detects the slightest edge to his companion’s voice. “Every time I thought I could settle in a place, I would suddenly be uprooted. Growing up, I never had the time to form a lifetime connection. Or maybe I didn’t try hard enough.”

“But … you have Nakajima and Kikuchi,” Taiga points out.

Hokuto’s voice softens, “Yeah, but Kento and Fuma have been friends as long as you and Tanaka are. And while I don’t mind joining their circle, sometimes I feel like I’m intruding on them. Still, they insist otherwise, so I try not to feel guilty about it.”

“You shouldn’t.” Taiga crosses his arms on the table and props his chin on his elbow. “This means I’ll have to talk to Juri eventually, huh?” His best friend’s birthday is next week, and he wouldn’t want to prolong their falling-out until then.

“I think you already know the answer to that.”

Honestly, even after a year, Hokuto hasn’t changed much. Sure, he’s still distant, but in a strange way, he seems to glow. He doesn’t smile much, but when he does, he means it. Despite being withdrawn, Hokuto is kind. Why else would he tolerate Taiga’s emotional baggage and offer him reassurance?

Maybe that’s why Taiga fell for him in the first place.

“You know, it was a real dick move of you,” Taiga blurts out. “Playing all hot and cold with me then finally telling me you used to like me. Where was that confession last year?”

Hokuto sets down his now-empty coffee cup. He takes his time in wiping his mouth with a napkin, folding the paper in half, and pressing it on the table. “I’ve been quite the jerk, huh,” he states rather than asks.

Taiga huffs. “Sure, you were.”

“I was shitty,” Hokuto confesses. “I let some past feelings get the best of me, and I was cold to you when I shouldn’t have. I didn’t think I’d ever see you again after dropping you off at your house.”

Taiga shifts until he’s sitting right up again. “About damn time you realized how annoying you are.” He clears his throat. “Anyway, let’s forget about the past, okay? We’re more grown-up than we were back then. Let’s just get to know each other and be friends, okay?”

Hokuto’s gaze bores straight through Taiga’s. “Friends,” he echoes with a smile. “I’d like that.”

Taiga does his best to calm down his protesting heart.

With a few weeks into rehearsals, Taiga is pretty sure he has everything under control. Rehearsals are going smoothly, his dance and singing skills seemed to have gotten better, and his chemistry with his leading lady seems to be improving.

What he loves the most about rehearsals is he gets to spend a longer time with his clubmates and members of the cast who aren’t part of the club. They fool around and do a karaoke or dance battle during their free time, but when it’s time to rehearse, everyone is serious.

(Also, the best part is when Dean Matsumoto would drop by rehearsals then treat them to snacks or dinner. No one can resist free food.)

And then there’s … Hokuto.

Honestly, Taiga still has a hard time figuring out how to face Hokuto after _that_ truth bomb that was dropped on him that day at the fire exit. His high school self would have swooned at the thought, but his college self also wonders if he’s just projecting his past feelings.

Hokuto, though, is following through his promise of trying to be friends with the theater club. He seems to have bonded well with fellow sophomores, particularly Kochi. He seems to be endeared with Jesse and Shintaro, too.

In short, Hokuto has made his way in Taiga’s circle of friends in the theater club, so naturally, Taiga has no choice but to try and get along with Hokuto, too.

Well, he _did_ promise to try and be friends with Hokuto. Might as well do just that.

_A hand shakes him awake._

_“Hey,” Hokuto greets. “Sorry for waking you up so early, but we should really get up right now.”_

_Taiga rapidly blinks to chase away the remaining drowsiness in his eyes. “Why? Something wrong?” He yawns, slowly stretching his arms._

_“Yeah, the police are here.”_

_“What?” Taiga jumps up, now fully awake. “What the fuck? Holy shit, why are they here?”_

_Hokuto breaks into laughter. “I was kidding,” he explains. “I thought it would wake you up.”_

_Unimpressed, Taiga narrows his eyes. “Wow, thanks,” he drawls. “Just give me a heart attack while you’re at it.”_

_“Hey, I’m sorry.” Hokuto raises his hands. “Anyway, be ready in twenty minutes. We have a long day ahead of us.”_

_“Why? Where are we going?”_

_Hokuto smiles at him. “You’ll see.”_

The thing about Taiga is that he doesn’t stop when he’s doing something he loves.

Rehearsals were minimized so that students can prioritize midterms, but that doesn’t stop Taiga. As much as possible, he still heads to the theater and the studio to work on his blocking and practice his lines and choreography.

And when Taiga has bitten off more than he chews, he shuts down.

“Hey, you don’t look so well.”

Taiga looks up and sees Kochi, looking at him with concern. It’s just them in the theater club, with most members probably holed up in the library or the campus study halls. He was finishing his review for his calculus midterms, but the formulas are practically swimming in his head. He barely slept last night, and the only thing he had for breakfast and lunch were those protein bars.

Despite that, he shrugs at Kochi. “I’m fine. Just the usual midterms stress.”

Kochi’s brows are furrowed, and it’s clear that he doesn’t buy it. He doesn’t insist, though, and instead, cheerily says, “Do you wanna stress eat?”

Taiga’s stomach grumbles at the question, and Kochi takes it as a yes even though Taiga hasn’t replied yet.

“Okay.” Kochi fishes out his phone. “I’ll ask the sophomores who wants to come with. I’m sure Jesse and Shin can come, too.”

“But—”

“Kyomoto Taiga, you’re going to burn out if you don’t take a break. Come on, we all need it.” He hauls Taiga up with some surprising strength Taiga didn’t expect. “It’ll just be dinner for a couple of hours. After that, you’re gonna get some sleep, and you’ll wake up and feel better.”

Taiga groans. “Fine.” He opens his bag and shoves his stuff inside. His usual way of blowing off steam is skipping classes with Juri to go to the arcade.

But Juri hasn’t been around in Saitama for the past year, so he might as well destress with the people around him.

Kochi’s phone beeps, and his face brightens. “Well, what do you know? Hokuto’s coming, too!”

_Ah shit._

He, Kochi, Hokuto, Shintaro, and Jesse head to a nearby restaurant that’s super popular among students for their cheap ramen. Taiga could only sigh in relief as he digs in the tofu ramen in front of him. He didn’t realize he had skipped meals until his first actual meal of the day.

“Man, I thought high school was bad,” Shintaro remarks, sullenly looking at the rest of the food in his bowl. “Now, I have to deal with school, a musical, and a part-time job.”

“You’re freshmen. Ours is worse,” Taiga grumbles, reaching for the last piece of gyoza on the plate in front of them. “More major subjects and academic requirements. And now Takaki-senpai and Takamina-senpai are pushing me to give my best performance.”

“Senpai, you’re literally an ace in the theater club. You got this,” Jesse reassures, pouring him a glass of tea.

A hum of agreement is heard throughout their table.

Kochi pats him on the back. “If it helps, we’re as stressed as you are. We just need to get through this.”

He’s right, Taiga thinks. The stress sucks, but at least he could share the burden. He’s already enjoying the company. Kochi is always a great person to talk to, and Shintaro and Jesse could make him laugh the worries away.

And Hokuto is …

Well, he isn’t the most outgoing one, but that’s just how he is.

Somehow, the exhaustion finally gets to him. Sometime between conversations about schoolwork and Hokuto and Kochi’s common friend at Seikei, he falls asleep.

Suddenly, he’s jolted awake by a hand shaking his shoulder. “What?” he exclaims at the top of his lungs.

When his vision adjusts, he sees Hokuto gazing at him with a forced smile. They’re no longer in the bright restaurant. It was dim, and Taiga recognizes the plush leather chairs of the lobby in his apartment complex.

“We’re at your place. The others headed home the opposite direction, but Kochi told me where you live,” Hokuto explains. “Come on, I’ll walk you up.”

Yawning, Taiga nods and drowsily gets up. “What a gentleman,” he teases, even winking for good measure.

Hokuto just laughs. “Wouldn’t want to trip and ruin that face of yours,” he replies.

“Rude,” Taiga sniffs. He nearly stumbles on his way to the elevator, but luckily Hokuto catches him in time. “That’s why you liked me, huh? Because of my pretty face?”

“That’s not it,” Hokuto says. He stays silent until they reach Taiga’s floor and Taiga successfully unlocks the door. His voice is hushed, but Taiga hears him loud and clear. “It’s not—it _wasn’t_ —just because you’re pretty, Kyomoto-kun.”

Taiga pretends not to hear Hokuto’s slip-up.

Hokuto gently guides Taiga to the direction of the living room. He lowers his head until Taiga can only see the shadows on his face.

“You’re always so alive, Kyomoto-kun. The way you performed and spoke—even when you’d show up to rehearsals looking down, you were still so bright. You had this air around you, like you were happy and didn’t care about what others thought.”

Sheepishly, Hokuto murmurs, “I wanted to be like you, Kyomoto-kun. I wanted to have that self-confidence, too.”

Taiga feels like someone had just dumped a bucketful of ice onto his head. His mind is still unfuzzy, but not as unclear anymore. He blinks twice, and he could have sworn Hokuto’s staring at him with a remarkably affectionate expression.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Taiga whispers, closing his eyes as the room starts spinning again.

He hears rustling next to him as Hokuto stands up. “Because I was stupid.”

Taiga wrinkles his nose and buries his face into the closest pillow. “Not much has changed,” he says, voice muffled.

“Yeah?” Hokuto’s laugh sounds downhearted. “I guess you’re right.”

Vaguely, Taiga is aware of a hand touching the top of his head and slightly ruffling his hair. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Kyomoto-kun. Sleep well,” Hokuto’s voice rings out.

“Good night,” Taiga mumbles, already half-asleep.

Maybe it’s his imagination, but he could have sworn that the fingers in his hair lingered for a second longer before pulling away.

_“Favorite color?”_

_“Purple. If you would rather set yourself on fire than eat one thing, what would that thing be?”_

_“Tomatoes.”_

_“What the fuck, what did they ever do to you?”_

_“I just don’t like the taste.”_

_“Sucks to be you, because I LOVE them.”_

_“Okay, okay, no judgment.” Hokuto nods, failing to hide his amused grin. “It’s weird. We’ve known each other for three years, but we’ve never really spoken to each other until this weekend.”_

_Taiga unconsciously clenches his hands into fists. “I wonder why,” he mutters wryly._

_When Hokuto speaks up again, there’s pensiveness in his voice. “Yeah, I wonder why,” he echoes._

**Tanaka Juri [6:44 pm]**

Hi Taiga

You don’t have to reply. Again, I don’t blame you if you don’t want to talk to me. It’s my fault, and I’m the one who has to accept responsibility.

I don’t know, it’s hard to explain. I miss you so much, but I also feel like it’s so hard to contact you. Even though we can hop on a train or call each other, I just don’t know how to do it. It’s not because I don’t want to talk to you. I just wish we still live next to each other and you’d come and sleep over.

I miss that a lot. I miss /you/ a lot, and I’m too afraid to pick up the phone because I just might miss you more.

God, what is wrong with me? I feel like I’m blaming you. I really suck at communication.

Anyway, I know that I’ve been a terrible friend, but I want you to know that I love you. Taiga, you’ve been my rock for eleven years, and it’s about time I stopped taking you for granted. You’re irreplaceable, and I hope you know that much.

So talk to me when you’re ready, okay? I don’t care how long it takes, but I’ll be there the second you call. We can work things out. We’re the Tanaka and Kyomoto duo after all! I’ll be better, I promise.

The phone rings only once before Juri picks up. “Hello? Taiga?” his voice exclaims, breathless and relieved.

Taiga can’t help but smile. “Hey, Juri. I’ve missed you.”


	7. Chapter 7

“Thank you!” Juri beams at the waiter, who sets down two plates of curry on their table. He says his thanks, then grabs his spoon and eats a spoonful of curry and rice.

Taiga doesn’t even try to hide his snort. “We ate breakfast a couple of hours ago, and now you’re hungry again?” he remarks nonchalantly, picking up the spoon on his side of the table.

“Yeah, and what about it?” Juri shoots back, unbothered as he takes in another spoonful of curry and rice. If anything, he looks _smug_.

“God, you’re disgusting.”

“Excuse me! I’m not the one who ruined instant ramen. _Instant ramen,_ Kyomoto Taiga.”

“Remind me of that again, and I’ll strangle you.”

There’s a short stretch of silence as they meet each other’s gazes before bursting into laughter.

It’s so easy to fall back in tandem with Juri, even if they haven’t spoken in a couple of weeks. There’s still a certain awkwardness, but that’s alright. They’re two best friends figuring out how to move on from a brief falling-out, so naturally, things are bound to be awkward. But the most important part is that they’re working things out.

With midterms over, Taiga has more time to relax. Takaki and Takamina heard about Taiga’s collapsing incident in the restaurant and insisted that he take a break for a couple of days. The understudy could take over and could use some stage time.

It’s not the ideal situation. It’s hard not heading to the theater or the studio straight after class, but Taiga tries to catch up by practicing on his own. It’s not the same, but it’s also the best thing he could do, lest he goes crazy.

At least he had one thing to look forward to—Juri visiting Saitama. He made sure to clear his schedule this time to meet Taiga, even though Taiga insisted that he be the one to go to Tokyo.

They’re celebrating Juri’s birthday, after all.

But either way, seeing Juri again and laughing as if nothing has changed is the best feeling.

They’ve resumed their nightly phone calls, but they talk about everything they could think of in the restaurant. Juri is promoted to an assistant managerial position in his part-time job, giving him less manual labor and more time to sneak in studying in between his shift. Things didn’t work out well with his girlfriend, but Juri doesn’t seem too bummed by it.

“Okay, enough about me,” Juri declares once they’ve cleared their plates and have moved on to dessert. “How have _you_ been doing, Taiga?”

Taiga blinks. “Well, I won’t be returning to rehearsals until tomorrow. I think I did great in my midterms, and …”

“Cut to the important part.”

He scrunches his nose when he sees the waggling of Juri’s eyebrows. “You’re disgusting, Tanaka.”

“Please, you love me for it.” Juri sets aside his place and leans close to Taiga. “How are you and Matsumura?”

Taiga’s memory immediately flashes back to their sort-of confession at the fire exit, that moment in Taiga’s apartment, and his face flushes red. That’s something he still hasn’t told Juri. “I-I-I,” he stutters. “We’re sort of friends now, but he’s still as confusing as ever.”

“Hmm? Confusing, how?”

Well, Juri _is_ his best friend, and they tell each other everything. Just to be sure, Taiga looks around the restaurant to make sure no one he knows happens to be in the same space. Then, he tells Juri everything.

When he’s done, Juri’s eyes and smile are wide. “You know what I think?” he asks.

Taiga sighs, raising his hands in defeat, preparing himself for the impending teasing. “Hit me with your best shot.”

Juri chuckles. “I think Matsumura Hokuto still likes you.”

He tilts his head, his brows furrowed. “Wait, what? Are you stupid, Juri?”

“I study at Keio. Obviously, I’m not. And it doesn’t take a genius to figure it out.”

Taiga glowers at him. “He could never. He said he used to like me. In the _past tense._ ” He conveniently ignores Hokuto’s slip-up in Taiga’s apartment because he corrected himself.

“And I’m sure that those feelings of yours aren’t leftover from your feelings in high school because now you’re friends with him,” Juri continues, sipping his iced tea. “So now, we’ve established that you like Matsumura, and he likes you, too. The next step is to confess to each other and become a couple, and boom! Happy ending!”

Taiga hits Juri across the chest. “Way to be blunt.” He purses his lips.

“Maybe, but when it comes to you, I have to be brutally honest.” Sensing Taiga’s discomfort, Juri reaches across the table and places his hand over Taiga’s. With a sympathetic grin, he gently says, “What’s holding you back?”

Taiga sighs and closes his eyes, his mind flashing back to The Weekend. “There has to be a catch, right?” he says. “One way or another, he’ll leave.”

It’s Juri’s turn to sigh. “He just transferred here. And you told me he’s making friends with everyone, so I think he’s pretty much determined to stay.”

“But—”

“You know.” Juri pulls his hand away and leans against his seat, arms crossed. “You two are much more alike than you think.”

Taiga blinks. “Huh? Alike? How?”

“Jesus.” Juri shakes his head. “You two have a reputation in high school, you know. Dating but never committing. You said Matsumura always leaves, but you can’t commit to a relationship either. That’s why rumors started about us, you know.”

He remembers being asked out by various people in high school. He had said yes to some of them, sometimes out of mutual attraction, other times to forget about his one-sided crush, but they never lasted.

Maybe because he could never move on from Matsumura Hokuto.

Or maybe, like Hokuto, like his parents, they would end up leaving him.

Juri heaves a heavy sigh. “Anyway, forget it. How are rehearsals going?”

Taiga had never been more relieved to change the subject.

_Taiga’s body jolts up, once again almost sleeping from the motorcycle ride._

_“Well,” Hokuto announces. “We’re finally here.”_

_He opens his eyes, and the sight before him causes his breath to catch in his throat. “Oh,” he breathes out. “Wow.”_

_Excited, Taiga steps down the motorcycle and practically flings his helmet. He’s so ready to run out that he almost stumbles on the ground. His life flashes before his eyes as he fails to regain balance, but a hand grabs his arm just as he thinks this is it._

_“Careful!” Hokuto exclaims, easing Taiga upright. “Anyway, I’m guessing you like the surprise?”_

_Taiga faces the clear, blue lake. “I do.” He grins. “Race you there!”_

_Even though he starts running first, Hokuto overtakes him. But the joke’s on him because Taiga’s the real winner in the end. After all, he gets to watch Hokuto strip his shirt off and jump in._

**Theater Club (Except Matsumura)**

**Oba Mina [9:37 am]**

Hey guys!

It’s Matsumura’s birthday on Wednesday

The Logistics Team is planning to surprise him with cake after rehearsals

So don’t leave the theater until then!

Taiga almost drops his phone in his face as he’s scrolling through messages while lying down. “Holy shit,” he exclaims, thankful that he’s by himself in his apartment.

How could he forget? Hokuto’s birthday is three days after Juri’s, so his high school self always remembered.

Not that he did anything for Hokuto on his birthday because he was too much of a coward. Not even an anonymous letter or gift discreetly stashed in Hokuto’s locker.

He sighs, stowing his phone away and closing his eyes. His conversation with Juri replays in his mind, and suddenly it’s too much to think about.

Why is it so hard to believe that they could mutually have romantic feelings for each other? Or worse, why is it so hard to believe that they could be in a relationship?

_Because mutually liking each other means you’ll end up together, but it could also mean he could leave you._

“You wouldn’t know until you try, Taiga,” Juri had told him before they parted ways that evening. “You deserve someone to love, you know, and Matsumura could be it.”

But the thing is, trying hard involves a different kind of courage. Taiga could perform in front of a million people, but he shrinks at the thought of talking to Hokuto about … _them_.

Not after That Weekend.

He groans and buries his face in his pillow, muffling a frustrated scream.

_“You really should have told me to pack a swimsuit. Now we have to wait for our pants to dry before heading back,” Taiga laments as he leans against the tree by the lake. His and Hokuto’s pants are hanging by the branch, moisture dripping out of them. He would have been self-conscious about being pants-less, but Hokuto was at least sensible enough to bring a pair of towels with him._

_Hokuto grins sheepishly. “Sorry. If it makes you feel any better, I’m also soaked.”_

_They’d spent the entire afternoon swimming and wandering around the lake. Taiga doesn’t remember the last time he had seen clear, perfect water before. No one else was around, and they were pretty much in the middle of nowhere, so Taiga had to ask how Hokuto even knew of the place._

_“Discovered it with Kento and Fuma last year,” Hokuto explains. “We were lost and came across this, and we decided it would be nice to take a swim. Turns out, no one owns the lake, and not many people know of it. We think of it as our little secret.”_

_“Then why did you bring me here? Am I special?” Taiga jokes, surprised with how flirty he had sounded._

_Hokuto keeps his eyes on the water. “If you say so,” he replies vaguely._

_A wave of fatigue hits him, so Taiga closes his eyes and leans his head against the tree trunk. On Monday, they’ll head back to school, ending this strange but beautiful weekend._

_Taiga doesn’t want it to end just yet._

_“I’m sorry about everything, Kyomoto-kun.”_

_Startled, Taiga opens his eyes and looks at Hokuto, his eyes still trained on the water. “Why would you be sorry?” he asks, fully awake. He straightens up his posture. “Is everything okay? Come on, tell me what’s wrong.”_

_Hokuto’s laugh sounds pained. “No, there’s nothing wrong. I guess I just … feel bad.” Before Taiga could respond, he hurries on to explain. “I mean, we don’t know each other yet, but I dragged you here for the entire weekend. I should have thought first before asking you to come with me. I didn’t think at all, and now I feel bad for whisking you away when you probably had more important things to do than hang out with me.”_

_“Hey, don’t be like that.” Taiga forces a smile. “I didn’t have to say yes, but I came with you. It was my choice, and I don’t regret it. I probably would be dying from all the studying, so it was actually nice to get away for a bit.”_

_Gently, he adds, “Matsumura, why did you ask me to come, anyway?”_

_Hokuto finally meets his gaze. “Because I didn’t want to be lonely.”_

_Taiga’s heart quickens. Maybe it’s because the sun is setting at the perfect angle to wash over Hokuto with fading light, or maybe he’s just a lovesick idiot. Whatever it is, he doesn’t think he’s been this close to Hokuto before—and not just physically, either._

_“I don’t want to be lonely, either,” he says. “Isn’t that reason enough?”_

_Because Juri has always told him to go big or go home, he leans over to close the distance._

_Their lips have barely brushed when Hokuto says something that ruins everything._

When rehearsals wrap up three days later, Hokuto was pleasantly surprised when the lights dim, and the Logistics Team comes out with Oba bringing out a strawberry shortcake with candles. The team starts singing a “Happy birthday,” and the theater club and the rest of the cast sing along.

“One more year, and you’re an adult, senpai!” Jesse cheers, slinging his arm around Hokuto’s shoulders.

Hokuto’s smile is one of the brightest Taiga has ever seen. His heart freefalls, rollercoaster style, at the sight.

_Say something, idiot,_ his brain supplies. Hokuto is surrounded by Kochi, Jesse, and Shintaro, the two freshmen chattering about something he can’t make out.

In the end, Taiga is a coward and is helpfully interrupted by Ohara, who asks if they could go over a scene.

When he and Ohara finish their discussion, his heart sinks to find out that it was just the two of them in the theater.

He sighs, bidding Ohara goodbye as they part ways outside the theater. He wants to kick himself in the shin for not being brave enough to do something.

Just a greeting would have been fine.

He’s so deep into reprimanding himself that he doesn’t notice the person next to him until he hears a soft cough. Caught off guard, Taiga jumps. “Jesus Christ!” he yells.

Hokuto coughs again to shield his laugh. “Thinking hard about something?” he asks, raising a curious brow.

Taiga quickly composes himself, nodding and smoothing down his hair. “You could say that,” he replies.

Hokuto doesn’t pry; instead, he nods. “I see. Heading home now?”

“Yup. You? Birthday plans?”

“Yeah. Kento and Fuma promised me dinner, so I’m meeting them in this restaurant.”

“I see. I’m heading home.” _Be brave,_ his brain tells him. He mentally takes a deep breath, “Wanna walk out together?”

_Baby steps._

It’s that bright smile again, and yeah, maybe being brave is worth it. “Sure.”

The walk isn’t eventful, with both of them making small talk. They recall shared high school memories, and Taiga mentions meeting Juri over the weekend. Hokuto seems relieved on Taiga’s behalf.

Unfortunately, time was too fast. They reach Taiga’s apartment complex in a matter of fifteen minutes, maybe ten. “Here we are,” Hokuto announces.

“Ah, yeah.” Taiga nods distractedly. “Here we are.”

Neither one of them makes a move.

Suddenly, it’s like he’s eighteen all over again, and he had just gotten into Matsumura Hokuto’s black motorcycle for the first time. If he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, he can feel the soft material of the baggy pants he had worn back in high school. He can taste the wind kissing his cheeks as Hokuto speeds down the highway. And if he opens his eyes, he’ll see the back of the boy he has fallen head over heels for—the boy who, to his knowledge, probably doesn’t love him back.

The boy who could probably leave him.

“Hey,” Taiga blurts out, avoiding Hokuto’s gaze. “Did you mean what you said back then? About why you liked me?”

He can feel Hokuto’s gaze on him, but he forces himself to avert his eyes.

“I meant it,” Hokuto says, the emotion in his voice unreadable. “And it’s true, even today.”

Taiga’s heart stutters. Unable to resist anymore, he looks up to face Hokuto with wide, confused eyes. The corners of Hokuto’s lips lift the slightest. “You’re still as bright now as you were back then.”

_Oh._

Taiga’s bag drops to the ground, and he crouches down, picking it up with shaking fingers. “I-I-I,” he stammers, well aware of the redness of his cheeks. “Um, I’ll just … get going. Have a good night, Matsumura. Happy birthday!”

“Wait, Kyomoto-kun.” Hokuto reaches for his wrist.

Taiga startles at the touch. “What?” he yelps.

Hokuto chews on his lips for a second before asking, “Do you want to get dinner sometime?”

Sixteen-year-old and eighteen-year-old Taiga scream in delight. The current Taiga manages a smile and squeaks out a “Yeah, sure—text me!” before running toward his apartment.

_“I-I can’t. I’m sorry. I’m leaving for Tokyo. For university.”_

_It takes a moment for the weight of the words to settle in, but once they do, Taiga feels like he’s been hit by a truck._

_“Ah.” Taiga pulls away, cursing the flushed nature of his cheeks. “Right.”_

_The ride back to the house is silent. Taiga slips into his room without a word, not wanting to see Hokuto now or ever again._

_He always knew chasing after Hokuto was never going to end well. But although he expected the rejection, that doesn’t make the ensuing heartbreak hurt any less._


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this episode of Kyomohoku being dramatic

Opening night always brings an inexplicable high for Taiga. There’s the stress of trying to get every note, line, and choreography on point before the audience takes their seats. There’s the rush of seeing the theater fill up from backstage and wondering what they’ll think of the show.

For Taiga, there’s also the weight of the entire show on his shoulders. He’s aware he doesn’t have to feel this pressure (“Because to quote an iconic movie, ‘We’re all in this together,’” Takaki had told them the night before), but most of the time, he can’t help it. He’s the star of the show, after all. All eyes will be mostly on him.

He tries to shrug off the nervousness and focuses on his pre-show routine. He’s sitting in his dressing room, all alone, as he plays some meditative music. His eyes are closed, and he forces himself to clear his mind and take deep breaths.

A soft knock on the door follows as soon as the music on his phone stops playing. Taiga sighs in contentment, stretching his arms before getting up and opening the door.

Whatever calmness in his head disappears when he’s suddenly facing Matsumura Hokuto.

Hokuto smiles apologetically. “I’m sorry. Did I interrupt something?”

Taiga shakes his head. “I just finished my pre-show routine. I’m fine. What’s up?”

Hokuto holds out a microphone, that dual ear headset that musical actors often wear for performances. “Some last-minute setups before showtime.”

“Oh, thanks.” Taiga takes the microphone from Hokuto and puts it on. He’s practiced wearing them during rehearsals, and he hopes he has worn it right. When he’s done, he sets down his arms. “Is it okay?” he asks.

“Hold on a second,” Hokuto says, stepping forward so that their faces are too close. Taiga would have stepped back on impulse, if not for Hokuto’s one hand reaching for the mic wire on the back of Taiga’s head, and the other hand on the mic.

Hokuto barely touched his skin, but their closeness sends shivers down Taiga’s spine. He could count the moles on Hokuto’s face—one on his cheek, another on the edge of his upper lip—and he wonders what it would be like to close the distance …

“Done.” Hokuto interrupts his train of thought, stepping back. He smiles. “All ready for the show.”

“Huh?” Taiga croaks. “U-Um yeah. Thanks.”

Hokuto nods. “Okay. Well, break a leg.” He gives him a small smile and a wave before closing the door.

Taiga gives himself a few seconds of silence before replaying his meditative music. He’s going to need it.

It barely registers with Taiga that the show is over until he’s on the stage for the curtain call. The audience is up on their feet, their applause echoing throughout the theater. From where he’s standing, he could spot Juri, and laughter breaks out when Juri shouts, “That’s my best friend right there!”

Taiga smiles too widely that his cheeks hurt as he bows, retreating to the line formed by his fellow castmates before they take their final bows.

As the curtain closes, they break into cheers, hugging each other for a job well done. They did it, and while they still have a few more shows in the next two weeks, the success of the first show is an excellent sign.

“I’m so proud of you!” Kaoru squeezes him in a tight hug. “You killed it out there, Taiga!”

Taiga feels tears on the edge of his eyes. He’s starting to feel emotional already—he’s always a crier during the opening and closing nights. “Senpai~” he groans.

“What, did I stutter?” She pulls away and pats his cheeks. “Anyway, gotta find Sakurako-chan.”

Soon, Takaki asks them to gather round as he makes a speech, thanking everyone for their hard work and encouraging them to push through until closing night. Somehow, Taiga gets shoved up the front to make a speech, and he tries to sound coherent while tears pour down his eyes.

Eventually, someone steps forward and hands him a bouquet. When the bouquet is safe in his arms, Taiga tilts his head to thank the giver.

His heart stutters when he sees none other than Matsumura Hokuto.

Hokuto’s cheeks are red, and he refuses to meet Taiga’s gaze. “Oba-senpai made me give it to you,” he murmurs. “Not that I’m complaining. Um, congratulations. You were amazing out there.”

Taiga wishes his eyes were less puffy, but he shoves those thoughts at the back of his mind. “It’s okay. I don’t mind if it’s you.”

He could have sworn Hokuto’s eyes widened, but instead, all that lingers in Taiga’s mind is his gentle smile.

**Kochi Yugo [3:59 pm]**

Hey!

Jesse got nice shots of you for the show

Check it here

[Link attached]

Also some backstage photos ;)

[Link attached]

Taiga opens the link on his phone to find a gallery of photos from the opening night. He smiles as he scrolls through each one, reliving the moment that comes to him in bits and pieces.

He clicks the link to the backstage photos last, and he groans at pictures of him crying while making the speech.

But it’s the last picture that Taiga lingers on the most. It’s a photo of him holding the bouquet while smiling at Hokuto beside him.

His breath hitches as he takes in the gazes they share in that photo. Any stranger would look at that photo and assume that something is going on between them.

He sighs. _Yeah, right. I can dream,_ he thinks, downloading the photo on his phone.

Rehearsals, show nights, and schoolwork seem to blend in the next two weeks that it feels like clockwork. This time, though, Taiga tries to strike a balance, making sure that he’s also getting enough food and rest to not almost burn out like last time.

Fortunately, the theater club is looking out for each other. Takamina sends them daily reminders like the mother hen that she is. When everything gets stressful, some send memes, while others send positive reviews of the show. They were more than enough to keep them going.

They also message each other extensively, with Taiga talking to Kochi, Jesse, and Shintaro the most.

Sometimes he and Hokuto chat, too, but it’s mostly mundane topics and none about the dinner date that they had agreed, like, weeks ago. (Taiga’s still holding on to that invitation.)

He’s looking forward to summer vacation, at least the first week. No schoolwork for a month. Although he has no plans, he and Juri will probably just hang out like usual, like their typical arcade and eating spree. They’ll probably stop by their hometown’s fireworks festival.

An idea pops in his mind. Taiga sets aside his textbooks and opens his phone.

**Kyomoto Taiga [4:34 pm]**

Hey

**Matsumura Hokuto [4:34 pm]**

Hello, Kyomoto-kun.

**Kyomoto Taiga [4:35 pm]**

Any plans for the summer?

**Matsumura Hokuto [4:35 pm]**

Not particularly.

My parents will be away to visit some relatives, and my brother’s spending his summer vacation with his friends at uni.

Kento, Fuma, and I will be going away for one weekend, though, but I’ll probably spend the rest of the summer at home.

Why?

**Kyomoto Taiga [4:38 pm]**

Hang out with us

Me and Juri

We’re both heading home for the summer

Juri has one weekend with his parents, but other than that we won’t be doing much

**Matsumura Hokuto [4:39 pm]**

Wouldn’t I be intruding?

**Kyomoto Taiga [4:39 pm]**

Nah

We’re friends, right?

**Matsumura Hokuto [4:40 pm]**

Alright, then. I’ll take up your offer. :)

Thank you, Kyomoto-kun.

I haven’t forgotten about dinner, by the way.

Maybe after the closing show.

**Kyomoto Taiga [4:42 pm]**

Oh, no worries!

Totally understandable

And yes, after the closing show! ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ

**Matsumura Hokuto [4:43 pm]**

:)

It may just be a smiley-face, but Taiga imagines it’s actually Hokuto smiling, and the butterflies in his stomach go haywire.

The closing show of any musical gives him a rollercoaster of emotions. On the one hand, he won’t be missing the hours of grueling rehearsals, practicing until his throat is sore and his legs are aching.

On the other, he will be missing the two-hour rush of adrenaline, of telling the same story in different ways, of watching the crowd rise to their feet until the curtains fall.

He’s going to miss those nights spent with his clubmates and castmates. And while the theater club will hold another show in the fall semester, that show will be different. There’ll be a new set of cast, and maybe Taiga won’t be the lead star anymore.

They accept flowers and gifts from the audience, and they even take pictures with some members of the audience who chose to stay for a bit. Taiga gets pushed and pulled to different directions, his cheeks hurting too much from smiling for the camera.

It’s all worth it, though.

When the crowd finally disappears, they trail backstage to freshen up. Dean Matsumoto had invited them to a party in celebration of a successful run at _Newsies_.

The after-party is in one of the College of Humanities’ bigger event rooms, decked with minimal decoration. The chairs are arranged around circular tables, and there’s a long rectangular table by the side for the buffet, all painstakingly arranged by the Dean in celebration of their hard work.

Yup, they all deserve this.

After Dean Matsumoto, Takaki, and Taiga’s speeches over dinner, the party goes full swing. The DJ—that Taiga barely noticed when he arrived—starts playing upbeat music, and the juniors and seniors head to the bar to get some drinks then proceed to the dance floor.

Taiga and the rest of the people who aren’t of legal drinking age had to make do with the food, which is goddamn delicious, by the way. Some of them head to the dance floor, while the others settle on their tables, talking about the musical, summer plans, and other random stuff.

Although Taiga thrives at parties, he has his limits. As the night draws on, he feels exhausted dancing and laughing along with the theater club and cast, so he excuses himself and heads to the balcony.

He sighs in relief when cold, summer air brushes against his face—nothing like getting away for a bit to help him recharge.

Taiga’s contemplating texting Juri when he hears the balcony door open, and a familiar figure emerges. “Hi,” Hokuto greets, shutting the door behind him. “Tired of the party?”

“Had enough socializing to last me a week.” Taiga smiles, leaning against the railing. He didn’t realize the campus looks stunning when scattered with dim lights. That, or he usually took the view for granted. “You?”

“Same.” Hokuto sighs, his shoulders loosening as he imitates Taiga’s posture, their shoulders almost brushing. “I’m not a party person.”

“Didn’t take you for one.” Taiga chuckles.

“Congratulations on _Newsies_. You were incredible throughout all the shows.”

Hokuto had told him before, but the compliment never fails to make his heart skip a beat. “You’re not so bad yourself, Mr. Pianist,” he remarks, lightly elbowing Hokuto’s shoulder.

“Thank you.” Hokuto chuckles before sighing. “Now, we have to deal with finals week before summer vacation.”

“Don’t remind me.” Taiga groans, burying his face in his arms. “Anyway, you’ve finished a semester in uni. How do you feel about it?”

Hokuto hums, his gaze on the fountain outside the College of Humanities. “Let’s say I’m glad I moved here.”

“Not planning to leave anytime soon?”

“Ah,” is all Hokuto says in response. It’s empty, quiet.

Inside, the music keeps blaring, and he hears Jesse and Shintaro laughing, and Inoo’s screaming about “YUTO AND YAMA-CHAN ARE MAKING OUT, I WON THE BET!” And none of it matters. Nothing in the world matters except for Taiga and Hokuto perched on the balcony with only the starry sky and dim campus lights as their witnesses, watching as Taiga waits with bated breath for Hokuto to say something. Anything would be better than this awful silence.

When Hokuto finally turns to face him, the corners of his lips are twisted. Taiga barely hears him when he whispers, “I was accepted in a student exchange program in France. I’ll be leaving in January.”

Cue the sound of a record scratching, glass breaking—all those cliché sound effects that spring up whenever the main character of a drama receives unexpected news. Except this isn’t some drama; this is Taiga’s life.

Dread pools in his stomach and Taiga’s hands lunge out to grip at Hokuto’s wrist. “I thought you liked it here,” he states. “I thought you said you enjoyed everyone’s company, and you’re not planning to leave.”

He knows he sounds pathetic—he can hear it in his voice. But none of it matters because this isn’t real. This can’t be real. Hokuto can’t just be leaving. He can’t.

Except, Hokuto carefully covers Taiga’s hand with his. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs.

And just like that, his heart plunges and breaks into a thousand pieces.

“The student exchange program is the reason I decided to transfer from Seikei.” Hokuto’s explaining, but Taiga is barely hearing the words coming out of his mouth. “This uni is partners with the university in France I was eyeing. I applied for the first-term junior year program, and I got in. I received the confirmation yesterday. I’ll be in France from January to June of next year.”

It sucks, Taiga thinks. More than a year ago, they were stupid high school kids who barely knew each other but ran away to a reclusive house for a weekend. Now, they’re almost adults who have managed to kindle a friendship.

Except, they’re back to where they started. Hokuto drops a bomb that he’s planning to leave right as Taiga is sure about his feelings and maybe ready to voice them out.

How fucking tragic.

“I love the theater club, and I love spending time with everyone. I’ve come to love the people on this team and the family that’s accepted me. I wish I didn’t have to leave, but—”

That’s it.

“Oh fuck off,” Taiga cuts in, spitting out his words like poison. Hokuto’s eyes widen as he reflexively takes a step back, but Taiga’s not about to let him get away like that. He tightens his hold on Hokuto’s wrist. “You wish I didn’t have to leave, huh? Then why the _fuck_ are you leaving?”

Hokuto lowers his head. “Because I had always wanted this, Kyomoto-kun.”

Taiga feels like he has been hit by a bullet train. It’s his turn to lower his head. “I-I’m sorry,” he says, shaking his head. “That was unreasonable for me to get mad.” He looks up and forces a smile. “It’s a fantastic opportunity, and I should be happy for you.

“It’s just that …” Taiga gasps for breath and squeezes Hokuto’s wrist, taking a step closer. “It’s just that I could tell you like it here. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have taken my advice and tried to be friendly with the entire club. You _want_ to stay here, right?

“And I know you’ll come back after the term, but you know, who knows what will happen?” Taiga tries to laugh, but he winces at the garbled sound that comes out of his mouth. “God, I’m so selfish and stupid,” he sniffs, furiously wiping his eyes and nose with his sleeve. “It’s just that I feel like I can never take a step forward without you pushing me back. You’re so fucking annoying, you know that, Matsumura Hokuto?”

“I’m sorry,” Hokuto says.

 _It’s now or never,_ the voice in his head reminds. _Do it now, or you’ll never stop regretting it._

So Taiga slips his hand down and laces their fingers together. He doesn’t tear his gaze away from Hokuto and takes one deep breath.

“I still have feelings for you,” Taiga confesses at last. “And I think you still like me, too.”

Hokuto’s eyes are suddenly glassy. “You’re right,” he chokes out in a hushed voice right before he curls his free arm around Taiga’s shoulders and pulls him close. He buries his face on top of Taiga’s shoulder, inhaling and exhaling like his life depended on it.

“You’re right, Kyomoto-kun.”

Taiga didn’t think he’d be one for emotional confessions, but here he is, barely containing the flood of tears that escape and stain Hokuto’s shirt. With his chin tucked on Hokuto’s shoulder and his arm wrapped around the other’s waist, he finds that he rather enjoys burying his face against Hokuto’s shoulder and letting out long, overdue emotions.

After falling in love all those years ago, getting his heart broken more than a year ago, and reuniting three months later, here they finally are—open, honest, brave.

The problem is, Taiga doesn’t know where _here_ is or where they’re going next.

“What do we do now?” Taiga whispers, mouth almost against Hokuto’s neck.

Hokuto tightens his hold on Taiga. “I don’t know,” he admits.

The reasonable parts of Taiga’s brain tell him to pull back and force them to talk things out and come up with a solution. Finally figure things out so they don’t end up running away and regretting everything.

But now, he decides to stay right where he is, because he’ll regret it if he chooses this to be the moment to let go.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this episode of Kochi Yugo being the MVP

_It’s dark when Hokuto’s motorcycle pulls to a stop outside Taiga’s house. The streetlights flicker, barely shedding any light on the streets. As expected, most of the lights are off. It’s a scene almost straight from a horror movie, except it’s more appealing than being in the same space as Matsumura Hokuto._

_Taiga clutches his bag to his chest with one hand while his other hand fumbles while opening the gate with his keys. “Well, that was fun,” he says, internally cursing himself for how awkward he sounds._

_“Right,” Hokuto echoes listlessly, looking at the ground._

_The tension in the air is so thick that Taiga’s chest constricts. He swallows and musters up a weak smile. “Uh, thanks for everything, I guess.”_

_Hokuto coughs out a short, uncomfortable laugh. “No worries. I’ll see you at school?”_

_Taiga’s grip on the gate tightens. “Whatever,” he scoffs, pushing the gate open with all his might. “See you never,” he snaps, slamming the gate behind him._

_He doesn’t bother looking back, not even with the sound of the whirring engine and the crunching of tires on the asphalt as Hokuto drives away. He refuses to spare that stupid boy one last glance. Because fuck him. Fuck him for whisking Taiga off to the middle of nowhere._

_If he could turn back time, he’d slap his freshman self and tell him never to bother with Matsumura Hokuto. He would go back on Friday night and tell his past self not to hop on the back of Matsumura Hokuto’s motorcycle and fall in love again._

_He breathes one last sigh over that stupid boy, straightens his back, and swear to shove his childish feelings down somewhere they’ll never resurface. Hokuto is just a boy. Taiga can get over him._

_The household help welcomes him in the entrance, and that’s all it takes to clear his mind for the time being._

The first week of August brings not only sweltering heat but also the stress of final exams. Taiga powers through them, sighing in relief when he steps out of the campus after his last exam for the day. It’s officially summer vacation.

As much as he’s tempted to head back home, he decided to hold off until next weekend. Juri and his family are in a family reunion in Niigata, so it wouldn’t be fun if Taiga spends the first week of summer vacation by himself.

Which is hypocritical of him, since everyone else has plans but him.

Maybe he could use the week to clean his apartment; that would give him plus points with the landlady—

“Kyomoto-kun.”

The familiar voice sends shivers all over his body. Taiga stops walking and turns around. His heart hammers erratically as he sees Hokuto approach, with Nakajima Kento right behind him.

“Oh, um, hey,” he greets stupidly, managing a small wave. “Done with finals?”

“Yes. You?”

“Just got out.”

“Hey, Kyomoto!” Nakajima greets, his arm around Hokuto’s shoulders. “It’s been a while.”

Taiga blinks. He had rarely interacted with Nakajima and Kikuchi in high school, so this present interaction is strange. “You remember me?”

“Sure, we do!” The edges of Nakajima’s lips tug up. “Fuma used to have a crush on you, and Hokuto here still talks a lot about you.”

“Kento …” Hokuto warns, his cheeks tinted pink, probably as pink as Taiga’s cheeks right now.

“Right, right. Fuma and I will meet you at the share house. Still need to pack. Nice seeing you again, Kyomoto!”

It takes a few seconds of silence before Taiga could force himself to stop blushing. When he looks up at Hokuto, he’s still blushing. _Which is really cute, by the way._

“Sorry about that,” Hokuto speaks up, scratching his cheeks. “Kento, um … likes speaking his mind.”

Taiga shakes his head. “You guys are hanging out this weekend, right? Where are you going?”

Hokuto doesn’t even try to hide his grimace. “Kento’s family vacation house.”

_Oh_. The memories start flooding back, and Taiga tries to repress them by doing what he does best. “So why wasn’t I invited to the party?” he jokes. “Too ashamed to bring me there unless it’s just us two?”

Hokuto gulps and _oops_.

“T-That was a joke, by the way!” he quickly adds.

Hokuto purses his lips. “Can I tell you something? It might sound mean, but still.”

He blinks. “Uh, shoot.”

Hokuto takes a deep breath. “I was supposed to ask if you want to come with, but I didn’t because I figured out you might say no.”

Oh.

“I see.” Taiga can’t help it when Hokuto flinches at how cold his voice sounded. “Well, have fun with your friends.” He spins around with more force than necessary and stalks away.

“Kyomoto-kun, wait!”

_You’re unfair,_ his conscience tells himself. _You wouldn’t have gone anyway, so stop moping._

A hand grabs his wrist, and he’s being spun around. Hokuto is breathing heavily, and Taiga realizes he is, too. He didn’t even realize he had broken into a sprint.

“I’m sorry,” he breathes out before Hokuto could say something. “It’s summer break and everyone else is out, and I’m by myself and I’m not leaving until next weekend.”

“What about Tanaka?”

“In Niigata with his family. I’m practically family, but I wouldn’t want to intrude this time. Kochi’s also with his family, and I think Jesse and Shin mentioned something about a trip with some classmates. So yeah.”

Hokuto hums. “I’m sorry, Kyomoto-kun. I thought you’d have plans before heading home, but if I had known, I would have invited you or stayed back. I feel guilty for assuming.”

“Hey, don’t be like that,” Taiga insists. “I would have felt guilty if I’d made you stay with me, so it’s fine.”

There’s a pause, then a slow, “Right” from Hokuto. “I guess we have to work on the whole guilt thing.”

Taiga clenches his free hand into a fist. “Yeah, we do,” he agrees listlessly.

They share another few seconds of silence. The bell rings, and Taiga clearly hears the chatter and laughter of students celebrating the end of the spring semester.

At last, Hokuto sighs. “I should go back to the share house. Sorry I’m not able to talk longer.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Taiga squirms. “Um, have fun, okay? We can always talk more when you get back. No more running away, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Hokuto replies quietly. “No more running away.”

Taiga lets out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding. “Good.” He nods. “Now go have fun. Tell Nakajima and Kikuchi I’m always down for dinner with you guys in the future.”

“Will do.” This time, Hokuto smiles. “I’ll see you soon, Kyomoto-kun.”

“Bye. You, too.”

He almost lets a “Love you” slip out, but Hokuto is out of earshot before the words could form.

**Kochi Yugo [3:54 pm]**

Pls save me from my parents

**Kyomoto Taiga [3:55 pm]**

Oh no

What happened

**Kochi Yugo [3:57 pm]**

They’re driving me crazy

They ask about my grades

My love life

So I had enough and told them I have plans this Thursday

**Kyomoto Taiga [3:59 pm]**

Which is???

“So I brought all the DVDs of all the Disney movies at home.”

Taiga blinks as he takes in the sight of Kochi standing outside his apartment, a backpack slung to one arm, and a sleeping bag tucked underneath another.

“Second of all, I’m craving for gyumeshi, and I know this awesome place that delivers,” he continues, shoving his way into the apartment.

He trails Kochi as he sets down his backpack on the couch. “Uh, you didn’t have to bring a sleeping bag, you know. I can always take the couch.”

“Nah, I hate sleeping in couches so I always bring my own sleeping bag.” Kochi grins. “Anyway, which movie should we watch first?”

**Kochi Yugo [4:18 pm]**

Since I know you’re bound to be worried, I’m here to tell you that Taiga’s alright

He looked a little down when I arrived, but he seems to be feeling better now

[attachment]

He cried when Mufasa died, but otherwise, he’s doing fine

**Matsumura Hokuto [4:24 pm]**

Why are you at his place?

Is he okay?

**Kochi Yugo [4:26 pm]**

He’s alone this week

Jesse, Shin, and I have been trying to invite him to things, but he keeps declining and insisting that he’d be too much of a burden

And since I live near campus, I took matters into my own hands

**Matsumura Hokuto [4:29 pm]**

I’m really glad he has you, Kochi.

**Kochi Yugo [4:30 pm]**

Yeah, I know, I’m a godsend (^_−)☆

**Matsumura Hokuto [4:31 pm]**

Thanks for letting me know how he’s doing, but if you don’t mind me asking … why?

**Kochi Yugo [4:32 pm]**

Look, I’m no idiot

He hasn’t told me what’s going on between the two of you

But I saw you both with swollen eyes when you left the after-party, so I put two and two together.

I’m not super aware of your history

But what I’m trying to say is get your shit together

Both of you

Whatever your problem is, it’s not as complicated as you think

I’m not gonna interfere because it’s not my place and I don’t know anything

But if you make Taiga sad, I won’t hesitate to run you over with my car and hurl your remains down the Arakawa River

Got it? (◕▿◕✿)

**Matsumura Hokuto [4:40 pm]**

Um, got it.

Again, I’m glad he has you.

**Kochi Yugo [4:41 pm]**

Good

Anyway, gotta go

We’re about to watch Tangled

On his TV, the final minutes of the movie tick down as Rapunzel finally reunites with her parents. Taiga watches as the scene switches to her greeting the people as a princess, then grabbing Flynn (or Eugene, whatever) and kisses him.

_Tangled_ is one of Taiga’s favorite Disney movies of all time, but for some reason, this scene doesn’t sit right with him.

“Hey,” he says, poking Kochi’s arm as the ending credits roll. “Have you ever wondered what happens to Rapunzel and Flynn after this? Like, now that they’re finally together and everything?”

Kochi hums, setting down the container of his omelet rice. “Doesn’t _Tangled_ have a sequel about the wedding? So I guess they turned out okay.”

Taiga sets his food down on the coffee table, suddenly losing his appetite. “That’s not what I meant,” he sighs, racking his mind for a way to express his thoughts.

He slumps further down the couch and sighs again. “Why do all these movies end after the couple gets together? Then what? Did they really live happily ever after for the rest of their lives? Why do we never see them, I don’t know, fight about chores or file taxes together?”

“Sounds like you’ve thought about it a lot,” Kochi comments. He barely bats an eye as he reaches for the bowl of popcorn they’ve made a couple of movies ago, grabbing a fistful.

Taiga shrugs pathetically. “Been feeling angsty these days,” he mumbles.

Kochi hums again. “Well,” he muses, “why not end it there? Sometimes it’s best to reiterate the point that they’re happy and in love.”

Frustration nags at his insides. “But isn’t that unrealistic? Wouldn’t showing what happens next set realistic expectations?”

Kochi shakes his head. “Because the exciting part is knowing whether they’ll get together. What happens next is the boring part. Besides”—he narrows his eyes—“what’s this about? I bet _Tangled_ has nothing to do with your emo hours.”

Quietly, he adds, “Is this about Matsumura?”

If it were someone else calling him out, Taiga would have squirmed and immediately changed the subject. But this is Kochi he’s talking to, and he’s no idiot. He’s always good at reading people, so it’s no surprise that he quickly picks up the real cause of Taiga’s anguish.

Kochi takes his silence as a yes. “Look, I don’t know what history you have with Matsumura except for what you’ve told me. I don’t know what’s going on between you two, either. I won’t ask. But I know you like each other. I also know that he’s leaving for that student exchange program in France next year, so I’m guessing that’s why you’re upset?”

Taiga lowers his gaze, cheeks flushing as he realizes how stupid the problem once since someone guessed it easily. “Maybe,” he huffs, too embarrassed to admit his own dumbness.

Kochi’s expression grows concerned. “Taiga, you do realize that it’s only for six months. And time zones suck, but you can always work with him to find a way to catch up on each other, right?”

Taiga suddenly finds his hands quite interesting. “That’s the thing, though,” he admits, the blush traveling up his face. “Like, I know it’s not the end of the world, but still. I’m not sure if our feelings are real or just sparked up because we meet again.”

Kochi casually tosses some popcorn in his mouth. “Why would you doubt your feelings? Simply seeing someone you used to like isn’t enough to trigger past emotions. It only works if you still like them.”

He has a point, but that isn’t enough to ease Taiga’s worries. He wishes he could shrink into his couch, then reprimands himself for being childish. He and Hokuto promised not to run away anymore, and he’s not going to break that after a few days.

“He always leaves, you know,” Taiga murmurs, squeezing his hands together that his knuckles burn. “I’m afraid during those six months, he’ll leave again. Because that always happens.”

He squeezes his eyes shut and inhales sharply. There, he finally said it. The reason why he’s feeling helpless. Maybe Hokuto’s going to France for six months, but who’s to say that’s where he stops? What if he decides to stay in France? And if he comes back, would he still have the same feelings for Taiga?

Right now, there are two things he’s very sure of. One, he loves Hokuto and has for years now. Two, he knows that Hokuto loves—or at least, _likes_ —him back for just as long.

But Taiga’s not sure if he wants to start anything only to let Hokuto go again.

In that case, maybe they were never meant to be together after all.

His thoughts are interrupted by the sensation of popcorn on his face.

Kochi’s looks murderous as he flings another handful of popcorn at him. “Jesus Christ, I knew you were stupid, but this is something else!”

“What?” Taiga snaps, furiously sweeping the thrown popcorn off the couch. “It could happen! He hasn’t had problems leaving before, so who’s to say he could leave again?”

“If you don’t want him to leave, then tell him you want him to _stay_ ,” Kochi retorts.

For a split second, Taiga dares himself to imagine asking Hokuto to stay and give him a chance, but then his pessimistic side blows that hope away. Making Hokuto stay won’t necessarily make him happy.

“It’s … not that simple,” Taiga argues weakly.

“Yes, it is,” Kochi dismisses. “It’s not the distance you’re afraid of. You’re afraid that he’ll get bored of you and run away. In that case, if you really want to be with him, _make it work!_ At least give the relationship a chance and see how it works. Heck, _talk_ to him first because you’re not gonna solve anything by moping, Taiga. Take some initiative, idiot.”

Kochi finishes by heatedly slamming the popcorn bowl on the coffee table.

Dumbstruck, Taiga stares at the popcorn that spilled out of the bowl and on the floor. There’s also an awful lot of popcorn on his couch. “You’re cleaning this shit up,” he points out, flicking off pieces off his shirt.

Kochi glares at him, standing up to get the broom by the entranceway. “Not my fault you’re emotionally constipated.” Still, Taiga doesn’t miss the brief smile on his friend’s lips.

Taiga grabs a handful of the remaining popcorn from the bowl and shoves it in his mouth. “Next movie?”

“Better be _Mulan_.”

“Roger that.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Tanaka Juri [8:29 pm]**

Guess who just got home~

**Kyomoto Taiga [8:30 pm]**

Omg!

How was Niigata?

**Tanaka Juri [8:31 pm]**

Literally the best!

Missed my family, too

Glad we went on this trip

But now that I’m home and I miss my best friend

Wanna play video games?

Heading into the Tanaka residence feels more like home than his own house will ever be. Mrs. Tanaka greets him and hands him a rice ball as soon as he enters, asking him how his term went. Mid-conversation about visiting Juri’s older brother, Koki, in Niigata, the youngest Tanaka brother says hi to him before leaving for the arcade.

Juri’s lounging on his bed when Taiga enters his room. He beams and sits up, holding out his hand for Taiga to high-five. “Just like old times, huh?”

Juri already has a video game loaded, a two-player shooting game set in a zombie apocalypse. Taiga’s not much for gore, but maybe some mindless killing of zombies could clear his mind of thoughts plaguing him ever since Kochi slept over.

It doesn’t work. Taiga’s character usually dies almost instantly that he lost count of how many times they had to restart a level.

“Okay,” Juri declares, pausing the game and turning to face him. “Something’s bothering you. Spill.”

And, since Juri’s his best friend and he’d rather not keep things from him, especially after that reprimand he got after revealing The Weekend a year too late, Taiga tells him what happened, down to what Kochi had told him.

He’s only interrupted when Mrs. Tanaka enters their room and hands them more snacks and a jug of water. Taiga is thankful because his throat is sore for talking for what feels like hours.

Juri doesn’t say anything until Taiga takes a bite of his croquette. “Remember when I told you I don’t have to go to Keio and we can go to the same uni together?”

Taiga smiles at the memory. He and Juri had their acceptance letters sprawled on Taiga’s bedroom floor. They had pretty much narrowed down their choice of university, and they just had to do more research on those options before deciding on which place to study. _Together_.

But then Juri received a letter, offering him a full scholarship to Keio University. Juri insisted that he could reject the scholarship because he and Taiga promised to be in the same university.

“I told you that it would be stupid to reject a scholarship from fucking Keio,” Taiga recalls. “I told you to go, and I’ll be fine.”

“Look how that turned out.” Juri spread out his arms, looping one around Taiga’s shoulder. “I mean, we had a bit of a rocky patch, but otherwise, we’re fine. It’ll probably be the case with you and Matsumura. Or with any other relationship.”

“I’m fucking scared, though,” Taiga admits, shoulders sagging. “Sure, he may like me back, but what if he leaves me? Maybe he wants to stay in France and doesn’t see me in the future? What if he falls in love with some hot French—ow! What was that for?”

Juri withdraws the hand he used to tap on Taiga’s head. “Stop overthinking,” he advises. “If you guys want to be together, you have to work things out. And you know the best place to start.”

Taiga dreads this question. The answer is clear, but it’s easier said than done. “Talk things out with him?”

“Bingo.” Juri smirks.

Taiga groans, burying his face in his hands. Being thrown into a zombie apocalypse sounds very tempting right now.

Just as Juri changes the topic and they are about to resume their game, Taiga’s phone beeps, and he practically shrieks when he sees the caller ID. Hands shaking, he opens the message.

**Matsumura Hokuto [4:58 pm]**

Hello, Kyomoto-kun.

Just letting you know that I just got back from the weekend with Kento and Fuma.

**Kyomoto Taiga [5:00 pm]**

Oh welcome back!

How was the vacation?

**Matsumura Hokuto [5:02 pm]**

Fun, but draining.

Glad I could hang out with Kento and Fuma, but I’m looking forward to spending the summer at my pace.

Taiga gulps as he rereads the message. Now would be the perfect time to invite Hokuto to hang out with him, as promised. Or maybe follow up on his promise for dinner.

Or, better yet, they can make the most of the summer to talk about what will happen to them.

He didn’t even notice Juri had read the message until his best friend snatched his phone. “You know, as your best friend who’s tired of this back and forth, I have an idea.”

Dread pools in Taiga’s stomach as he watches Juri type something on his phone. “W-What are you doing?” he demands, standing up to snatch his phone back.

“Helping you.” One last press of the thumb and he hands the phone back to Taiga. “You’re welcome, bitch.”

Taiga looks at the message Juri had sent to Hokuto, and he wants to combust.

**Kyomoto Taiga [5:05 pm]**

Hey

If you’re free today, wanna have dinner at Juri’s place?

We’re having hotpot!

He curses Juri for knowing him so goddamn well that he picked up how he texts. He hopes Hokuto is perceptive enough to recognize that the person who texted him is not Taiga at all.

**Matsumura Hokuto [5:07 pm]**

If it’s not too much of a bother, I’d love to. :)

The moment Juri told his mother that they invited an additional guest, Mrs. Tanaka made sure that she prepared a feast.

It’s always a feast in the Tanaka family dining table, but when Taiga and Juri went down, she looked like she went all out. And to think Juri only told her of the additional guest an hour before dinner.

The butterflies in Taiga’s stomach were already fluttering the moment Hokuto accepted the invitation to dinner, but they went haywire when the doorbell rings. It’s Juri who volunteers to get the door, and Taiga wants to run away when he hears his best friend’s, “Hey, Matsumura! Long time no see!”

Hokuto’s wearing a simple T-shirt and jeans, but he looks like he came out of some modeling catalog. He offers a smile at Juri, then meets Taiga’s gaze. “Hello, Kyomoto-kun,” he greets.

Taiga really hopes it’s just the summer heat that’s causing his face to warm up. “H-Hello,” he manages to stutter.

As always, dinner with the Tanaka family is lively. Mrs. Tanaka asks the questions mothers would usually ask to get to know their children’s friends. She seems to be charmed by Hokuto, polite smiles and all.

“So, Matsumura-kun,” Mrs. Tanaka speaks up as she fills Hokuto’s plate, even after he insisted he’s starting to feel full, “a handsome boy like you must have many admirers.”

Taiga almost chokes on the strip of beef he just slipped in his mouth.

“He was pretty popular back in high school, Mom.” Juri smirks while he pats Taiga on the back.

“Oh, really? Are you currently seeing someone?”

Taiga really hopes the ground would open up and swallow him whole. Why do mothers have to be curious about their son’s friend’s dating lives? He loves Mrs. Tanaka, but—

“Um …” He could have sworn Hokuto’s grip tightens around the glass of water. “We’re working things out. Hopefully.”

Taiga’s too quick to whip his head up and meet Hokuto’s gaze. He looks expectant, and Taiga understands. This is it. They’re both done with running. And sure, they have four months left, but Taiga’s not going to delay this any longer.

Then and there, as he and Hokuto share gazes across the Tanaka dining table, Taiga is sure that this all ends tonight.

Hokuto thanks Mrs. Tanaka for the meal and bids his goodbye. Mrs. Tanaka insists that he visit again soon, which Hokuto promises to do so.

“What are you gonna do now?” Juri whispers as they stand in the living room, watching Hokuto put on his shoes.

Taiga’s heart is hammering forcefully that he almost doesn’t hear his best friend the first time. Then he remembers what he promised himself during dinner. _This is it._ “I’ll …” he says, with as much determination as he could muster. “I’ll head home, too.”

Juri seems to understand, patting Taiga on the shoulder. “Okay. Good luck.”

He bids Mrs. Tanaka goodbye and calls Hokuto on his way out. “Walk me home?” he asks, hoping Hokuto doesn’t hear his irregular heartbeat.

Whether Hokuto is nervous, he doesn’t show it. “Okay,” he replies evenly, waiting for Taiga to put on his shoes before opening the door for him.

The walk to Taiga’s house is short and uneventful. Hokuto mentions what they did at Kento’s family vacation house, and Taiga makes the occasional comments. His hands won’t stop shaking no matter how hard he wills it to stop. Hokuto definitely notices it, but he’s kind enough not to say anything.

They’re practically a few feet away from his house when Taiga blurts, “Can you stay inside for a bit? We should … talk about what comes next, I guess.”

Hokuto keeps his gaze trained ahead, but he nods. “Okay,” he agrees.

The house is quiet, as always, when Taiga opens the door for Hokuto. “Do you want anything to drink?”

Hokuto shakes his head, taking in his surroundings. The house is huge, interior design modern and minimalistic, but it’s quiet. It’s always too quiet except for the chatter of the maids when they’re doing their chores. Taiga wonders why his parents decided to keep this home when they’re not always around and Taiga’s away for university.

Anyway. That’s a question for another day.

He takes a deep breath. “We can … talk in the backyard.”

“Okay.”

Taiga walks past the kitchen and slides the door leading to the backyard. There’s a gazebo with a couch and an artificial fireplace, his parents’ usual place for entertaining guests. It’s also Taiga and Juri’s favorite place for hanging out.

He sits on the couch and pats the space where Hokuto should sit. He feels the couch sink slightly, and he fixes his gaze on the artificial fireplace.

Back in Saitama, he’s prepared an entire speech in case he had the courage to talk to Hokuto. In his head, the speech is eloquent, expressing everything he has been feeling for the past few years.

But right now, all that escapes his lips are, “I want you to stay.”

He could see the beginnings of a smile blooming on Hokuto’s face, but his lips suddenly form a straight line. “Kyomoto-kun,” he sighs, “I want to, but it’s what I want, and—”

“I know you want to go to France,” Taiga cuts in, surprised that his voice doesn’t shake. “Don’t worry. I’m not gonna try and convince you to give up your spot in the student exchange program. I’m not that selfish.”

He squeezes his hands together and takes a deep breath. “And that’s okay, really. Because more than that, I want to be with you. And you don’t have to stay for that to happen.”

Hokuto inhales sharply, but Taiga beats him to whatever he is about to say. “Let’s take this one step at a time, okay?” he offers reassuringly. “First, just … tell me if you want to be with me, too. So, do you?”

“I do,” Hokuto says without a moment’s hesitation. He’s looking at Taiga, dark eyes locked into his with no intention of backing away. Hokuto gulps, and when he speaks again, he’s visibly trembling. “Kyomoto-kun, everything I told you is true. I’ve liked you ever since you saw me play the piano in the music room and told me I should join the theater club. That hasn’t changed all these years.”

If these were one of those Disney movies, this is where their story would end. Cue to the obligatory happily ever after. But this is reality, and Taiga knows they’ll have to deal with the complicated, in-between parts.

He reaches out and slips his hand against Hokuto’s.

“Okay.” He nods, concentrating on the way their fingers lace together so naturally. “That’s good, because it’s the same for me. I’ve had the biggest crush on you ever since the first day of freshman year. I thought it would never go anywhere, though, so when you asked if I wanted to hop into your motorcycle with you that weekend, I thought I was dreaming.

“I was too afraid to talk to you, and we never saw each other outside of school back then, but for that one weekend, I’d say we were friends. That was all I thought I’d ever get, and I was happy with that. You even opened up to me, which tricked me into thinking that maybe I had a chance.

“When you told me you didn’t want to be lonely, I got ahead of myself and tried to kiss you, only for you to remind me that you’re leaving for Tokyo. I spent years thinking it was a rejection, Matsumura. How was I supposed to know that the whole time I’ve been pining over you, you liked me too?”

He tightens his hold on Hokuto’s hand. “I don’t know where I’m going with this, but I have feelings for you, and you have feelings for me. Except we were stupid high school kids, and we didn’t do anything about it. Now that we’re almost adults, I’d like to believe we’re more mature.”

 _Just go for it,_ Juri had told him.

So that’s exactly what Taiga does.

“So let’s try. Hokuto,” he whispers, face breaking into a small smile, flushing at his use of Hokuto’s first name. “Let’s do things right this time.”

Hokuto’s looking at him right now with what he recognizes as fondness, sincerity, hope, and love. Taiga’s heart leaps all the way to his throat, and he’s not sure whether he wants to laugh or cry.

Hokuto uses his free hand to smooth a wayward lock of Taiga’s hair. The touch is more intimate than he expected, and it feels as if it’s normal for Hokuto to be so close and touch him so lovingly.

“I want that, too, Taiga.” He bites his bottom lip as he tries not to smile too widely. “I want everything you just said. So let’s do it. Let’s give ourselves a chance.”

In a lower voice, he murmurs, “I know all I’ve done was leave before, but this is where I plan to stop.” He runs his fingers through Taiga’s hair, causing him to shiver at the contact. “Maybe I don’t make a place a home. It’s the people who matter more. And you were the one who helped me figure it out, Taiga.” He beams. “It’s all thanks to you.”

Feeling strangely bashful, Taiga decides against making a snarky reply and, instead, lurches forward and kisses Hokuto.

Hokuto cups Taiga’s face in his hands and kisses back even harder, smiling against Taiga’s lips.

Taiga smiles back because this is it. This is the dream that bloomed inside him the moment he met the shy boy on his first day of high school. This is the dream that shattered to pieces when Hokuto said, “I can’t. I’m leaving for Tokyo. For university.” This is the dream that rose from the ashes when they met again a year later. This is the dream Taiga never expected to come true.

If his younger self could see what’s become of that dream, he thinks he’d breathe a sigh of relief and yell “Fucking finally!” But then they’d probably smile and know it was worth the wait.

**KYOMOTO & MATSUMURA NOT ALLOWED**

**Jesse Lewis [8:21 pm]**

WE HAVE A SITUATION

[link attached]

**Takaki Yuya [8:22 pm]**

IS THAT

**Jesse Lewis [8:22 pm]**

MATSUMURA SENPAI’S IG ACCOUNT

HE’S HOLDING SOMEONE’S HAND

AND HE’S GOT KYOMOTO SENPAI TAGGED

**Takahashi Minami [8:24 pm]**

We can check the link thank you very much Jesse

**Mitsumune Kaoru [8:24 pm]**

Taiga has the same post, with Matsumura tagged!

**Takaki Yuya [8:25 pm]**

OMG

FUCKING FINALLY

**Kochi Yugo [8:26 pm]**

You can say that again, senpai

**Takaki Yuya [8:26 pm]**

F U C K I N G

F I N A L L Y

**Kochi Yugo [8:27 pm]**

… Guess you’re very invested in this relationship

**Takaki Yuya [8:28 pm]**

After what you told the group chat

Definitely

**Jesse Lewis [8:29 pm]**

But wait

The most important part is

Who won the bet?

**Takaki Yuya [8:30 pm]**

Oh yeah!

The sheet with the list of bettors is in the club room tho

**Mitsumune Kaoru [8:31 pm]**

Oh don’t worry

I took photos of all the ongoing bets

Hold on

**Takaki Yuya [8:32 pm]**

God you’re a lifesaver

**Mitsumune Kaoru [8:37 pm]**

[photo attached]

Congrats to the winner, ig

**Takaki Yuya [8:39 pm]**

Wait

WHAT

**Inoo Kei [8:40 pm]**

¬‿¬

Easiest money I’ve ever made

**Takaki Yuya [8:41 pm]**

JFC NOT AGAIN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this episode of: Inoo Kei (Get well soon, bb!)


	11. Chapter 11

The next day after The Day Taiga and Hokuto Made it Official, Juri invites them to brunch over at some restaurant that’s a frequent hangout for high school students. It’s a small American diner-type restaurant with the best pancake and bacon breakfast platter that Taiga ever had.

Juri’s already sitting in a diner booth next to the jukebox, browsing through the menu. When he spots Taiga and Hokuto approaching, he stands up and glances at their intertwined hands. “So, it’s official.”

Taiga and Hokuto share a glance before looking at Juri, their faces red. “Yup,” Taiga replies.

Juri lets out a sigh, steps closer to them, and uses his hands to deliver a slap on the side of their heads. “Fucking finally!” he declares before sliding back to his side of the booth.

“Ow!” Taiga yelps, rubbing the side of his head. “Shouldn’t you be congratulating us or something? I mean, we did just get together.”

Juri rolls his eyes. “You mean you dumbasses finally dealt with your emotional constipation to get together after almost four years of pining?” he retorts. “I think you deserve that slap for being stupid.”

“Ouch.” Hokuto winces, still rubbing the side of his head as he sits down the other side of the booth, dragging Taiga next to him. “You really got us there, Tanaka.”

“I speak nothing but the truth.” Juri sniffs, picking up the menu once more. “And drop the formalities. You can call me by my first name since you’re Taiga’s boyfriend and all.”

_Boyfriend,_ Taiga repeats in his head with an internal giggle. That’s going to take some more getting used to.

“Well …” Hokuto hums. “I will if you call me by my first name.”

“Alright then, Hokuto.” Juri grins. “Also, please tone down the PDA, or I will set you guys on fire.”

“No promises there,” Taiga says, squeaking when he feels a hand on his knee. _That_ will take _a lot_ of getting used to.

**Tanaka Juri [12:40 pm]**

Had fun today

Hokuto seems nice

And I’m happy for you

But if he hurts you, you tell me and I’ll beat him up

Also you’ve got a hickey on the side of your neck (∩❛ڡ❛∩)

**Kyomoto Taiga [12:43 pm]**

BITCH

YOU ONLY TOLD ME NOW???

Barring the head slap from Juri, the response about their relationship (from Kikuchi and Nakajima to the entire theater club that, to no one’s surprise, had run a bet on them) is positive.

“Glad to know my lecture was worth it,” Kochi told him over text. “You finally pulled your head out of your ass, Kyomoto!”

But other than the initial congratulations, nothing significant happens. There’s no big fanfare as if no one really cares because everyone expected it to happen eventually.

For Taiga, the lack of reaction is both a blessing and a curse. It’s a relief that there isn’t a big fuss other than the teasing. On the other hand, he can’t help but feel unsure.

If their friends go around like nothing has changed, how are he and Hokuto supposed to act around each other? Is their dynamic supposed to change now that they’ve held hands and kissed a few times?

Juri hums thoughtfully as Taiga rambles. They’re in the backyard gazebo, munching on chips. (Hokuto is away with his parents for the day, and Taiga promised he wouldn’t be that person who ditched his best friend just because he has a boyfriend.) He tilts his head to the side. “Are you thinking about sex?”

Taiga’s phone plummets to the ground. Red-faced, he lets out a shrill wail as he picks it up and cradles the device as if it’s the most valuable thing in the world. Fortunately, it doesn’t have any cracks, but he’s still tempted to hurl something at his best friend, who has a shit-eating grin.

“Of course, it’s not about sex!” Taiga exclaims a little too loudly. Hopefully, the household help is out because the last thing he wants is for her to eavesdrop and relay this to his parents.

“I’m kidding.” Juri laughs. He shifts his position so that he’s lying on the couch, legs poking behind Taiga. “I get what you’re coming from, though. It’s like you’ve pined for Hokuto for so long, so now that you’re finally together, you don’t know what to do next, right?”

“Yeah.” Taiga grimaces. He ducks his head and plays with the hem of his shirt. “I mean, of course, I’m happy that Hokuto and I talked things out and both want this to work. I’m fucking delighted, really. But then I thought about it a bit now, and I’m like, holy shit, I never planned this far. It’s great that we can make out now, but what else are we supposed to be doing?”

Juri rolls his eyes. “Gee, I don’t know, Taiga,” he drawls. “You’ve dated before, haven’t you? What happens when you get together, dummy?”

Taiga hums. “I don’t know. We go on a date?”

Juri looks completely unimpressed. “Then maybe you should start there,” he says wryly.

His best friend’s right; he always tends to be. Taiga’s dated before and never gave it much thought, but there’s something about the fact that now it’s _Hokuto_ that makes him eager to get it right.

And it’s not because it took him almost four years to get to this point; even though he’s had romantic relationships before, he’s never felt so strongly for anyone the way he feels for Hokuto. Maybe they won’t end up working in the end, but Taiga will be damned if he lets Hokuto go without them trying their best.

“I really, really like him,” Taiga admits in a small voice. “I don’t want to mess this up.”

“Hey, now.” Juri offers him a supportive grin. “You probably know this, but it’s obvious that he really, really likes you, too. Have a little more faith in yourself, Taiga. You won’t mess up that easily.

“But if he ever messes up, I’ll take the train straight to Saitama and beat him up. Swear on my life.”

Taiga chuckles. “Gotcha.”

For the most part, things go effortlessly after that. Taiga takes Juri’s words to heart and relaxes, deciding that he shouldn’t be stressing too much. He likes Hokuto, and Hokuto likes him, and even though relationships are, well, _relationships_ , they’ve got this.

They text more often, and Taiga discovers that Hokuto is chattier over text than in person. Which he doesn’t mind. Whenever they meet—whether it’s at each other’s homes or on dates outside—Hokuto can talk a lot about things he’s passionate about, but silences spent with him are comfortable, too.

Oh, and also, it’s probably because they’re in the first few weeks of dating, but they literally can’t keep their hands (and lips) off each other. Taiga couldn’t count (and he doesn’t dare because he’s embarrassed to do so) the number of times Juri, the household help, his parents (wow they went home when Taiga’s home), and Hokuto’s parents have walked in on them making out.

Hokuto’s got a lot of preparations for his student exchange program. He wouldn’t have to worry about his course load until the fall semester starts, but he wanted to finish planning and packing as early as the summer.

So, unfortunately, they don’t have much time to go on extravagant dates (at least, as far as college students could afford), except for that one fireworks festival, but that’s fine with Taiga. Curling up on the couch against Hokuto or holding his hand as they stroll the shopping street is enough to make him happy.

Hokuto, though, is more worried. “I feel like I’m not treating you the way you deserve,” he mentions one evening as they cook pasta together at his house. Well, it’s more of Hokuto cooking alone after Taiga nearly cut his finger chopping carrots.

(It’s so sexy, the way he stirs pasta on one hand while the other runs through his hair.)

Hokuto sighs. “I wish I could take you out of town, but I’m saving up for all my exchange student expenses, and it’s so unfair to you, Taiga.”

Taiga, from where he’s sitting on top of the counter, fondly rolls his eyes. “Calm down, Hokuto,” he interrupts, his voice gentle yet stern. “You don’t see me complaining, do you?”

Hokuto hesitates, glancing up from the food to lock gazes with Taiga. He finds it cute how Hokuto’s nervous.

“I’m not mad,” Taiga assures. Judging by the way Hokuto bites down on his lips, he’s still not convinced. He scoots as close as he can without accidentally sitting on the stove and loosely wraps his arms around Hokuto’s neck. “Come on, don’t be so hard on yourself. I’m not holding it against you.”

Taiga leans over and drops a quick kiss on Hokuto’s lips. “You’re doing your best, I’m never going to blame you,” he murmurs, squeezing Hokuto’s shoulder.

To Taiga’s relief, Hokuto’s posture relaxes, and the worried expression is replaced by softness in his eyes. “Okay,” Hokuto concedes, shuffling closer until his forehead is resting on Taiga’s collarbone. “Thank you.”

Taiga tilts his head. “For what?”

He feels Hokuto smile against his collarbone. “Thank you for giving me this chance,” Hokuto whispers. “Thank you for loving me, Taiga. I love you.”

It takes everything in him not to choke on the surge of emotion that overwhelms him. Hokuto _loves_ him, which Taiga already knew, but hearing the words out loud hits differently. “Holy shit,” he croaks.

Hokuto pulls back with a smug smirk. “Isn’t this the part where you say you love me, too?” he jokes, though he chokes up a little.

“Don’t ruin the moment, idiot,” Taiga groans, hitting Hokuto lightly on the chest. “Of course, I love you, too.”

Taiga had high expectations when they would actually tell each other the L-word—fireworks, fanfare, or maybe at least an emotional moment when they would stare into each other’s eyes while some romantic song plays in the background.

But because this is Hokuto he’s talking about, Taiga knows he doesn’t mind the scenario the least bit.

“Fuck!” Hokuto suddenly yells, shoving Taiga aside with wide eyes. “The pasta!”

_Oh yeah,_ Taiga thinks as he watches his panicking boyfriend deal with the overflowing pot. As much progress as they’ve been making lately, they’re still idiots. Great to know that some things will never change.

Time flies quickly, and the next thing Taiga knows is that summer is about to end. He’s definitely not going to miss the heat, but he’s definitely going to miss the free time that he’ll never have once the fall semester starts.

They have at least two more weeks before they are to return to university. Taiga wants to make the most of their time before he and Hokuto are once again consumed by academics and club activities.

The weather is strange, and they still experience occasional summer rains. This spelled disaster for the picnic date Taiga had arranged. He and Hokuto were just about to dig in their bento when the sky rumbled, and rain started pouring.

By the time they arrived at Hokuto’s house, they were both soaking wet.

“You okay?” Hokuto asks after a quick run upstairs, returning to the entranceway with a towel.

Taiga reaches for the towel, but instead, Hokuto wraps the towel around Taiga’s head, rubbing his head with it. “Bummed that the rain didn’t spare our bento.” He sighs and relaxes into the sensation of his head getting massaged.

Hokuto chuckles. “I’ll make us some ramen. And I think there’s still some leftovers in the fridge.” He sets down the towel. “Go get changed. I have some spare clothes for you in the bathroom.”

“What about you?”

“I can change in my room.”

Taiga takes a quick shower, making a note of the scent of the body wash in the bathroom (coconut). He’s quick to towel off, tie his hair into a half-ponytail, and change into Hokuto’s clothes ( _Hokuto’s clothes_ ), which are way too big for him, but now he understands the giddy feeling that comes with wearing a boyfriend’s clothes.

By the time he’s done, the scent of ramen and beef fills the dining room. Hokuto’s hair is all over the place, making him look like an adorable poodle. He’s already seated on the dining table, busy scrolling through his phone.

He looks up only when Taiga clears his throat. Hokuto’s eyes widen, and a blush crosses his cheeks. “Um …”

“Too big on me?” Taiga asks, lifting the shirt slightly so he can tuck the hem inside the shorts.

Hokuto shakes his head. “It’s fine. I like it when you wear my clothes.”

Taiga feels the flush creep to his entire body, and he hastily changes the topic by declaring that he’s hungry.

By the time the plates are cleared, the rain still shows no signs of stopping. Hokuto insists that Taiga stay over, which is a first for them. Not that Taiga minds.

Taiga finishes wiping the table when he hears a soft melody from the piano keys. He spots Hokuto on the piano in the living room, fingers playing with random keys.

“Play me something?” Taiga asks as he approaches. He presses his chest against Hokuto’s back, wrapping his arms loosely around his boyfriend’s neck.

Hokuto sighs contentedly, tilting his head up. “Got any requests?” he asks.

“No, you pick what you play.”

It doesn’t take long for Hokuto to choose a song. Taiga recognizes it as that song called “What a Wonderful World,” which he always hears playing in some cheesy film.

It’s also the song he first heard Hokuto play when he ran into his boyfriend in the music room that freshman year. The mere memory brings an overwhelming surge of emotions that Taiga almost chokes out. He closes his eyes and presses his forehead against the top of Hokuto’s head.

“Everything okay?” Hokuto asks once he finishes playing.

His boyfriend has his head tilted up, giving him the fondest look Taiga has ever seen. He smiles. “Never better,” he answers, leaning forward to press their lips together.

“Hey,” Taiga murmurs later when they’re wrapped in the sheets together. “I wanna ask you something.”

“Hmm?” Hokuto shifts, head drooping against his pillow. He yawns, tugging Taiga closer.

Taiga rests his head on Hokuto’s bare chest and throws an arm over his midriff, satisfied with the additional warmth. “Why were you searching for a home for so long?”

“Oh.” Hokuto’s breathing stills. “Well, it’s not that deep.”

Taiga hums, waiting for the rest of the answer.

There’s something _shy_ about Hokuto’s voice when he speaks up again (a stark contrast to last night when he most certainly didn’t feel shy at what they did). “It’s just I was constantly moving from Shizuoka to Tokyo to here, and it was hard for me to connect to anything or anyone. Then, the teenage angst hit in, and I convinced myself I never belonged anywhere … that stuff.” Hokuto’s ears are pink as he laughs self-consciously. “I thought I’d never find an actual home. It turns out I didn’t have to, in the end.

“Sorry.” Hokuto grins, burying his face in the pillow. “I’m emo, I know.”

“Don’t be sorry,” Taiga says, tracing Hokuto’s collarbones with the tips on his fingers. His heart swells when Hokuto shivers under his touch. “Your feelings are valid, Hokku. You’re never stupid for feeling lost. But if you ever feel like that again, tell me so we can work things out. The farthest I’m letting you go is France.”

Hokuto’s laughter vibrates through his chest.

Suddenly, a spike of guilt stabs through Taiga’s heart, so he cranes his neck up to leave light kisses on Hokuto’s jaw. “Okay, that’s actually unfair,” he admits sheepishly. “What I really mean is, I support you and your life decisions. So while I’d prefer for us to be as close as possible distance-wise, if you feel the need to go somewhere else, you’ve got to tell me how you’re feeling and—”

Hokuto leans down for a proper kiss. “We’ll cross that bridge when we get there,” he promises. “But for now, I’m not leaving anytime soon.”

**Hokku** **💗** **[6:30 pm]**

Taiga

**Taiga [6:30 pm]**

Yeah?

**Hokku** **💗** **[6:31 pm]**

Are you doing anything over the weekend?

**Taiga [6:31 pm]**

Not really

Why’d you ask?

**Hokku** **💗** **[6:32 pm]**

Look out your window.

Frowning, Taiga gets up from his bed and heads toward the windows. He pushes them open, to be greeted by the sun completely setting before him, as well as the view of the nearby park.

But that’s not where he’s supposed to look.

He looks further down at the gate of his house and sees Hokuto standing outside, dressed up in a black shirt that shows his collarbones, as well as loose jeans.

Hokuto looks up from his phone and smiles at Taiga so widely that he feels his heart burst. “Well?” Hokuto asks. “What do you think?”

It’s just like the weekend before senior high school final exams when Hokuto stopped outside his house and asked if Taiga wanted to get away with him for the weekend. His high school self had said yes, knowing it was too good to be true to spend the weekend with his long-time crush.

Now, the scenario is different. Sure, it’s still the same invitation, but they’re far more honest and surer of their feelings for each other.

Taiga smiles back. “Let me just pack a bag,” he calls, closing the window.

A change of clothes, a hastily stashed luggage (with a swimsuit this time), a note to his household help, and a text to Juri later, Taiga closes the gate of the house and meets Hokuto’s gaze. His boyfriend holds out a helmet for him. “Shall we?” he offers.

Taiga takes the helmet, but he leans forward and kisses Hokuto first before putting it on. He hops into the back of the motorcycle and confident snakes his arms around Hokuto’s waist, leaning his head on Hokuto’s back. “Let’s go,” he declares.

And just like before, they drive off into the night, but this time, they’re more confident that they’re going to be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is it: the end of my first-ever Kyomohoku fic. I didn’t expect it to be this long, but it did, and I’m quite happy with the result.
> 
> A huge thank you to everyone who read, kudos-ed, and commented on my fic. You are one of my motivations to finish this story.


End file.
